In "Life As We Know It," Holly (Katherine Heigl) and Eric (Josh Duhamel) find that life as they know it comes to a screeching halt when their friends, who named them as godparents and guardians of their daughter, die. The pair, who've disliked each other since going on a disastrous date, become an instant family with baby Sophie, but they have no clue what parenting involves.
Too bad they didn't reorder their Netflix queue, because, as that famous saying goes (OK, the famous saying we just made up), everything we ever needed to know about parenting, we learned from baby movies.
Don't Over-Baby-Proof the Home
As Seen In: 'Baby Mama' (2008)
As Tina Fey's Kate prepares to have a baby via surrogate Angie (Amy Poehler), she decides that baby-proofing the home is an important step towards ensuring baby is happy, healthy and safe in his or her new surroundings. She goes way overboard. And while a newborn isn't likely to make its way into the toilet, an adult-sized human should be able to.
Be Wary of Pee Mouth
As Seen In: 'Riding in Cars With Boys' (2001)
Teen mom Beverly (Drew Barrymore) finds that changing the diaper of a male baby involves a risk that is not present when changing the diaper of a female child. Hint: It's what will later allow him to be able to write his name in the snow, but as a baby, he doesn't have such directional control. As a result, we learn we must proactively seek out ways to prevent -- there's no better way to put this -- pee mouth. The solution: The Pee-Pee Teepee, a tee-pee-shaped tent that makes a welcome layer of protection between you and baby's pee-wee (and in clown hat, Santa hat and rock 'n' roll skulls versions).
Strollers Are Not Evil
As Seen In: 'Away We Go' (2009)
Impending parenthood has sent Burt (John Krasinski) and Verona (Maya Rudolph) on a quest to find the best place to raise their child, and, along the way, they spend time with Burt's obnoxious friends LN (Maggie Gyllenhaal) and Roderick (Josh Hamilton). Burt and Verona bring a gift for the family: a new stroller for LN's son, which prompts LN to share the strange ethical issues she has with strollers.
Burt decides the best way to combat LN and Roderick's rude, opinionated 'tude is to throw it right back in their face: He puts their son in a stroller and runs him around the house, which, to his friends' horror, the kid loves.
Keep Electrician Tape Handy
As Seen In: 'Baby Boom' (1987)
High-powered Manhattan business exec Wiatt (Diane Keaton) can handle multi-million dollar projects, but properly attiring an infant with a disposable diaper turns out to be a challenge for her. We learn that no matter how capable you are, sometimes being a parent means admitting you require help. If that help comes in the form of electrician tape to keep a diaper firmly closed in all the right places, so be it.
You May Have to Break the Law
As Seen In: 'Raising Arizona' (1987)
Reforming (sorta) criminal H.I. (Nicolas Cage) and policewoman Edwina (Holly Hunter) marry and want to have a baby, but when they find out Edwina can't conceive, they kidnap one of the "Arizona Quints," the offspring of a local furniture millionaire. Once you become a parent, you will go to ridiculous lengths to give your child what it needs, even if that means outrunning (literally) the law, facing off against a vicious dog, commandeering a getaway vehicle and putting a pair of pantyhose on your head just to get your baby a pack of Huggies.
There Will Be Vomit
As Seen In: 'Parenthood' (1989)
Suburban dad Gil (Steve Martin) is committed to spending time with his growing family, including a junk food-filled day out at a baseball game, followed by some kiddies with upset tummies. This cautions us to beware of the power of suggestion with kids. If you ask a child with an upset stomach if she feels like she wants to throw up, be prepared for her to do just that, right then and there, all over you and your bed.
People Like Pregnant
As Seen In: 'Knocked Up' (2007)
Alison (Katherine Heigl) gets her dream job as an on-air reporter on E!, but then finds out she's pregnant after a one-night stand with slacker Ben (Seth Rogen). Alison wigged out about her bosses at the network finding out she was preggers, needlessly, it turned out. As an E! exec told her, "People like pregnant." Sure, he was speaking from a ratings POV, but it's true that most people do like pregnant women and babies. Which means yes, you should feel like a giant creep the next time you see a pregnant woman on the subway and don't give her your seat. Or at least point to her belly, give her a thumbs up and say, "Score!"