One positive thing we can say about this season of The Bachelorette is that it appears that neither Ali Fedotowsky nor her possible future ex-fiancees Chris or Roberto has a mental illness. Of course, this may be a premature judgment -- a year ago at this time, Jake Pavelka merely seemed like a bland, earnest pilot and not someone who took his courtship advice from Mel Gibson -- but both guys seem like solid characters. And even Ali isn't nearly as bad as her detractors believe; the worst thing you can say about her is that she looks more ready for last call than for the altar.
Ali's quest for love ends (ABC, Monday 8 p.m.) in Bora Bora, where her family will get to grill the two finalists. I can guarantee that at some point during the two hours, Ali will utter the phrase that is always a part of these finales: "I'm falling in love with two men!" But only one can get the final rose -- no more than one, that is. We will learn if the rampant speculation about the ending to this season that Ali is still single was in fact correct, and after Ali's decision is announced, we can rehash it all on "After the Final Rose," where Ali, Roberto, Chris, and Frank the Liar will presumably have a full bar.
Also this week:
Tuesday: The Bad Girls Club (Oxygen, 9 p.m.): Between a certain ex-Midwestern basketball player, the Jersey Shore gang, and this series, it's turning into pop culture's Summer of Miami. The fifth season begins with scheming out of the box, as one of the new roomies proves so instantly obnoxious that the others try to get rid of her right away. Hey, set her up with Dexter! He's single now.
Wednesday: Big Brother 12 (CBS, 8 p.m.): By next week, this season will already be half over. Time flies when you're trapped in a house all summer. The veto competition will pit doofus Hayden and nonentity Kristin in a battle to get off the block. Can someone please tell Rachel to stop screaming at me in the Diary Room? It's like I'm back in kindergarten, and the poor man's Christina Hendricks is my teacher.
Thursday: Real Housewives of D.C. (Bravo, 9 p.m.): We've been hearing about this series since the Salahis were busted at the White House last November, and now it's finally here. Jealousy reigns (there's a shock) on the series premiere, as one of the housewives pointedly refuses to attend Michaele Salahi's polo party. It's not like a housewife to skip a chance to flip a table.
Friday: Friday Night Lights (NBC, 8 p.m.): The best series currently running on any of the Big Four networks concludes its fourth season with preparations for Thanksgiving, the big showdown between East Dillon and the Panthers we used to love, and a final goodbye to a pair of the show's most important characters.
Saturday: Frost Giant (Syfy, 9 p.m.): Saturday night on Syfy is becoming one of the most reliably funny times of the TV week. This week's Big Scary Creature is the title character, which I guess is easier to spell than "Abominable Snowman." Dean Cain stars, and if you have to be trapped in the mountains with a ravenous ice beast, Superman is the guy you want on your side.
Sunday: Army Wives (Lifetime, 10 p.m.): Does having Jill Biden guest star as herself qualify as "stunt casting?" The wife of the veep appears at Fort Marshall to promote a benefit "fun run," and to visit with some of the spouses who have loved ones abroad. Also, Denise (Catherine Bell) has to try to stay out of the middle when her sisters fight, and Trevor's unit encounters trouble.