Amazing Race Recap: Moscow Marching Orders

I can safely say last night's episode of The Amazing Race was the funniest yet this season, which is notable only for the fact that this show isn't meant to be funny in the least.

The teams left Borat Country, Kazahkstan, and flew to Moscow, Russia. Though before they left, Andrew and Dan, still wearing slippers after leaving their shoes at the children's theater, splurged on new sneakers at the airport. They had new kicks, but also the feeling that this move was going to come back and bite them in the wallet.

Upon arrival in Russia, teams traveled to a local monastery -- Nick and Starr had the first of their three unintelligible cab drivers -- and got their marching orders to travel to Kolosok Camp, a nearby military camp. There they gathered the details for their Detour: "Boots or Borscht." In "Boots," teams needed to join a training squad and march one full lap of the parade grounds, all to the approval of an on-site officer. In "Borscht," teams would serve borscht to a company of 75 Russian soldiers.

The coolest part of both options was that teams were to don styling military uniforms, in which Dallas looked pretty damn hunky. He and his mom, Toni, breezed through marching and were quickly on their way to a local bakery while Ken and Tina, Nick and Starr, and lastly, Andrew and Dan, tried to channel their inner Private Benjamins. Actually, in Dan's, case, it was more like Gomer Pile. This kid couldn't march to save his life. "I'm sports and TV-based. I'm a Jewish white kid. I have no rhythm," he said. I think I laughed out loud six times during this bit, after which the boys gave up and served soup instead. Wise choice, I'd say.

Arriving at the Zhukovsky Bakery in first place were Dallas and Toni, who jumped right into the Roadblock -- unloading fifty 50-pound bags of flour from a truck. Dallas and Ken were well served by their brawn and their teams were quickly on their way. Nick and Starr said goodbye to their crap-ass cabbie and he tackled the flour bags with more aplomb than I expected from such a thin wiry guy. Coming in last, as always, at the Roadblock were Andrew and Dan, the latter of whom did the Roadblock, and quite well, I'd say. Perhaps some needed redemption for his clowniness? "I'm good at cavemen tasks," said Dan.

Not surprising at all, Dallas and Toni came in first, followed soon after by Ken and Tina. Nick and Starr somehow overcame yet another crazy cab ride to land in third place. Andrew and Dan were held up, as they predicted, by their lack of adequate funds for their cabbie. After some haggling, the cabbie took what looked like their American money and let them go. They came in last -- no news flash here -- but, lucky for them, it was a non-elimination round.

Though a Speed Bump loomed in their future, the goofy kids were pretty damn happy. "People like to see the underdogs win," said Andrew. I'm inclined to agree.