Heroes Would Make for a Better Movie

Let me just say it first before anyone does in the comments section. Heroes already did make a good movie. It was called X Men and it starred Hugh Jackman, instead of that dude from Gilmore Girls.

But seriously, am I the only one who’s sat in front of the TV on a Monday night being bored by one of Mohinder’s pseudo-intellectual monologues and thinking, “Wouldn’t it be great if this whole story was over with in two hours?” Heroes gained such a huge following in its first season due simply to its awesome premise: everyday people from around the world discover they have superpowers, and deal with it in a way that doesn’t involve capes and unitards. (Okay, the hot cheerleader probably didn’t hurt with the ratings, either.) Throw in a truly scary bad guy who cuts people’s brains out and steals their powers, and you have a full-blown geek phenomenon on your hands. There’s just one problem.

Each season of Heroes is presented as a chapter of a comic series come to life. But if you tried translating a comic book into a television show, the action of one book would fill up about one act of TV, not an entire episode. No matter how many characters the writers introduce, if they’re all fighting towards one common goal, that’s not enough story to fill up twenty-two hours of television a year without boring the viewers or distracting them with extraneous subplots.

Here are three things that would be way cooler about Heroes if it were a movie instead of a TV show:

1. There Would Be Less Talking

Let’s face it, even the best super power-based movies and television shows struggle to keep their dialogue sounding sharp and believable, and it probably doesn’t help Heroes that its two wittiest characters speak mostly in Japanese. Condensing the story into a movie would mean less time listening to these characters whine about the burdens of their powers, and more time actually using those burdensome powers.

2. Character Unity

One of the most exasperating things about watching Heroes is not knowing if you’re going to get to see your favorite character on any given week. Unlike Lost, where everyone’s stranded on the same island, the Heroes lead their own lives that rarely intersect. After two seasons, some characters haven’t even met each other yet! In a movie, you simply can’t make every single character a lead. The less interesting ones would be given less to do, and we’d spend less time waiting to get back to the cool ones.

3. Bigger Budget = Better Action Sequences

Remember how season one promised to end with an epic battle between Peter and Sylar, two characters of nearly infinite power? And remember how that epic battle turned out to be little more than a shove fest? I can’t believe I’m actually saying this, but Heroes might actually benefit if Michael Bay and his explosives could get involved.

So what do you think? Were the heroes destined for the multiplex, or would your living room feel empty without them?