A few months ago I wondered if Tom Cruise had become too Tom Cruisey. With TMZ stalking everyone even remotely famous and 75% of the nation more interested in Tom's views on psychotherapy than in who their senator was, I thought it relevant to ask if Tom's cult of personality had overwhelmed any semblance of his acting ability. The answer, sadly, was pretty much that it had. But where does Tom's spouse stand here? With Mad Money looming on the horizon it's time to ask, "Has Katie Holmes also become too Tom Cruisey?"
First off, my personal bias. I really like Katie Holmes. I enjoyed watching her and Jimmy Van Der Beek from the Creek dole out wonderfully scripted wisdom every week. I thought Katie was the best thing about the wildly overrated Thank You For Smoking. Heck, I even liked her in Batman Begins, though she won't be reprising her role. What gives, Chris Nolan? However, the larger problem is this: Katie has been missing for two years. That's right, her resume doesn't have a credit listed for '06 or '07. Now, sure there was the birth of Suri in there, which had to keep her busy, but not one appearance? Not a cameo? Nada? Color me confused.
So then, it looks like Mad Money will be the first real test of her box office draw since the marriage. The bad news is that it's a January release, which is Hollywood code for "Hey, does anyone know where we can dump this?" After that she's got Tropic Thunder with Ben Stiller in July, but it looks like a smaller part because around 100 other actors are listed. Then it's The Other Side, which doesn't have a release date as it just started filming. All of which adds up to this: who the heck knows if Katie Holmes has become too Tom Cruisey? She's been out of the game and doesn't look to be headlining anything of note anytime in the near future.
I guess the good news is that the general public hasn't given up on Holmes, if only because they haven't had the chance to. I'd throw the same advice to Katie that I threw to Tom -- do a comedy. Use your stature to make people chuckle. If there's one thing audiences love it's self-deprecation. What about Mr. and Mrs. Smith II for the two of you? I'm sure I could write that given an afternoon. Lots of wire work and such.
Hmmm. Now I'm just sad. I originally started writing this to determine the box office viability of the wife of one of Hollywood's biggest stars, but now I feel like I'm handing in my assignment only to get an "incomplete." There's simply no telling where Katie will end up in all this. I guess all I can do is speak from the heart, Dawson's Creek-style, and say, "Hang on, it's going to be a bumpy life."