Jessica Simpson Ruins Everything

I don't know anything about football. There's a ball -- it's brown. There are weird pitchfork-style things sticking up from the ground and men run and, as I'd tell my college boyfriend whenever he'd promise me we'd go shopping when the game was over, the number-one rule of football is that the clock must never be running. Every girl knows what I mean. "Ten minutes left" means "two hours left" because the number-one rule of football is that the clock must never be running. Never ever ever. If the clock is running, something terrible happened.

Anyway.

This guy Tony Romo is good at the football game.

Except for when his new girlfriend, Jessica Simpson, is in the stands.

Then Tony Romo sucks at football.

He had the worst game of his career this weekend, with Jessica there.



The Evil Beet

Celebrity gossip with an evil twist.