Angelina Jolie vs. Natalie Portman: Who Ya Got?

Once again, it's a weekend battle of head-to-head stars. This weekend we have another truly titanic matchup and this time it is a battle between two of the most beautiful women in the world. In this corner we have everyone's favorite foster mom, Angelina Jolie. And in this corner we have one of the few actresses to run the child actress gauntlet and make it through unscathed, Natalie Portman. Let's drop the cage. You know the rules. Two women enter! One woman leaves!

In the box office this weekend: Winner = Jolie

This one is a real wild card that only the folks with a line on tracking will really be able to predict. But, while I definitely believe in the long term holiday weekend potential of Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium, I think the sheer star power of not only the cast, but the behind-the-CG brains on Beowulf will lead this unique endeavor right to the top this weekend.

In the critical arena: Winner = Jolie

Despite the fact that Magorium was scripted (not to mention directed) by one of Hollywood's hot new talents, Zach Helm, the guy responsible for last year's wonderful and sadly overlooked Stranger Than Fiction, I've got a feeling that critics are going to be bowled over by all the bells and whistles of Beowulf and particularly the, um, talents of Miss Jolie. Although, I'm getting the feeling that neither is going to be particularly savaged this weekend.

In their careers: Winner = Jolie

This one pains me. I want to give it to Portman. She's more talented. She has a much better sense of what projects to take. And she has yet to achieve her full potential as both an actress and a celebrity. But Angelina Jolie is one of the biggest stars in the world. As bizarre as she might be, as poor as the career choices are that she's made in the years since her Oscar win, as much as she can't keep herself out of the tabloids for so much as five minutes – she's huge. She's reached the peak of success and doesn't appear to be going anywhere. She's not even the main character of Beowulf and I'm writing about her. What can you say? She wins.

In my heart of hearts: Winner = Portman

How can you not love Natalie Portman? She's adorable, sweet and a talented actress. Jolie is just… weird. And frankly it kind of creeps me out that she seems to have to concentrate to completely close her lips. Natalie takes this one in a walk.

Winner = Jolie

Please. The only way Portman could win in this contest is if someone distracted Jolie with some stray orphans.

C. Robert Cargill - - - Email me


Austin-based Cargill, who not only loves but owns The Cutting Edge, writes on movies and DVD five times a week.