Grindhouse Set To Split My Heart In Two

All this talk about splitting up Grindhouse and re-releasing it as two separate movies is already giving me an ulcer. For curiosity reasons, I'd like to see a longer cut of Death Proof, but the greatness of Grindhouse is not just in its execution but also the idea, its concept. The double-feature aspect, what with the mock trailers in between the two films -- all of that is half the fun! People who decide to see the longer cut of Death Proof before seeing Grindhouse because the latter is "too long" are being party-pooping, ultra-soft pieces of Johnson & Johnson cotton, I say.

Now, I don't begrudge the Weinsteins for wanting to try anything to make their money back, I'm just a little nervous as to what this will mean for the DVD release. Are we going to be facing some shiesty plans to sell the movies separately upon the initial DVD release? Are we going to get Grindhouse: The Doubly-Bloody-Feature Edition six months down the line? What's grindhouse lingo for "double-dip"? Hopefully, they'll go the way of the Sin City - Unrated (Two Disc Special Edition) and have the stand-alone feature option as just that ... an option. The problem is that edition came out a good four months after the initial Sin City release. Who knows what this means now.

For all my complaining, it really doesn't matter if Grindhouse is cut up into fifteen parts. I'm getting the DVD(s). Because I'm pathetic like that.

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Dre writes five times a week for Film.com, covering movies and DVD with his Floridian flare. E-mail him!