Britney's First Husband Sure Did Love That Bitch

So, yeah, as has been firmly established at this point, Britney Spears does drugs. Well, hopefully she doesn't currently do drugs -- at least not if Daniel Baldwin has anything to say about it -- but she used to do a lot of drugs. Like for years, people.

Ehhhhnyway, her first husband, Jason Alexander (the twit from Louisiana, not the twit from Seinfeld) is such a darling that he's opted to spill his romantic guts to The Sunday Mirror of London. He recounts an episode during which Brit almost OD'd on E (the drug, guys, not the television network, although I suppose both are equally possible):

"I took her into the bathroom and threw her in the shower. She was unconscious. She tripped and fell. I was trying to hold her up and speak to her. She wasn't moving. I remember looking down at her all crumpled in the tub with the water coming down. She looked so white and lifeless. I thought she was dead. I thought, 'This bitch is going to f--king die right here in front of me.'"

I wonder if this happened before or after he married her. Good decision-making all around, kids. It was sweet of him to care enough about the "bitch" to not call 911 at the time, but, rather, wait a few years and call a British tab. That's what I do when I think my friends' lives may be in danger, too.

The Evil Beet

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