Hive Five: An Alternate Titantic Soundtrack

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Titanic is one of those monumental romantic blockbusters that many will claim to only ever have seen only once. Many more will openly admit to have cried during multiple viewings. As polarizing as the corniness of this lovelorn drenched drama may be, there’s no denying it’s one of the most watched historical romances of all time; Titanic was to the nineties what Casablanca and Doctor Zhivago were decades before. For those of us who were going through puberty when the movie hit theaters in 1997, Jack Dawson was our long-lost love, Kate Winslet’s naked lounging was scandalous enough to seem pornographic and, most importantly, alongside NSync and the Backstreet Boys, the Titanic taught us that True Love might actually exist. But just last week, Kate Winslet told MTV News that Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On,” the epic tune from the film, makes her want to throw up. She’s 100% right and thus, we’ve taken the liberty to play music supervisor for a moment with these more digestable songs about sinking ships.

1.Mastodon, “Hearts Alive

Picture a Titanic directed in the style of Baz Luhrmann’s Romeo + Juliet, a movie wherein Leo played yet another lovelorn teenager that was doomed to die in a most romantic way. In our new drugs, sex, and rock-and-roll rendition of Titanic, we’ll replace the ship’s somber-faced chamber quartet with a cameo by Mastodon as they give a raucous end-of-the-world performance of “Hearts Alive.” (The song comes from the band’s Moby Dick-themed Leviathan and is wrought with dark sea imagery.) As we see it, screams of “Taken down with hearts alive / Our hearts alive” and “Swim below eternally / Into the deep blue sea” couldn’t be more perfect for Jack and Rose’s last frantic run through the self-destructing bowels of their sinking cruiser.

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