Hey KStew! Here's Lessons You Could Learn From 5 Comic Book Cheaters

Don’t worry, Kristen Stewart: you’re not the first person in the world to cheat on their significant other… And you probably won’t be the last. However, we’ve got a little advice for you, based on a few more fictional situations. Here are nine comic book cheaters, and a little advice KStew could take from them on how to handle things going forward:

Scott Summers

Scott Summers and Jean Grey are like two boring fish boringly being boring with each other… Which of course meant that Marvel’s original Mutants were meant to be. That is, until writer Grant Morrison took Cyclops, and had him engage in a mental affair with formerly evil telepath Emma Frost. Last, Jean died, and then visited Scott as a ghost urging him to continue the affair with Emma in the physical realm. And they’ve been together since then, so KStew: head to RPatz’s grave, and just see what happens!

Jim Gordon

In Batman: Year One, the normally upstanding Jim Gordon started having an affair with his partner, Sarah Essen. When a corrupt police commissioner threatened to expose the affair, Gordon confessed the affair to his wife, and Essen left Gotham City. Later, they got married! Then the Joker shot her in the head, because, you know, Gotham City. Our main takeaway from this for Stewart would probably be, “Don’t move to Gotham City.” Actually pretty fair advice to anyone, affairs or no.

Crystal

The son of Magneto, and one of the first Inhumans never had the most rock solid marriage, as it had her tenuously choosing between the speedster, and the Fantastic Four’s Human Torch. Though Crystal never physically consummated her relationship with Johnny Storm while with Pietro, she did cheat with a real estate agent named Norman Webster, kicking off the famous ‘90s crossover “The Norman Webster War.” Just kidding. If anything, Crystal has always been defined by her relationships with male characters – usually two a time – so perhaps both she and KStew could do with a little removing themselves from the situation.

Matt Murdock

How do you make things worse for yourself when you’re one of the most notoriously relationship cursed superheroes ever? If you’re Matt Murdock, you sleep with the detective you’re working with - Dakota North - while your blind wife is in a mental hospital after being poisoned with a fear solution in order to torment you. Murdock was grief stricken, and eventually divorced his wife. Meanwhile, Stewart could look at this as a, “things could be way worse” scenario.

Black Canary

Oh boy, where to start? The sometimes wife or girlfriend of Green Arrow found out that her mom - the original Black Canary - had an affair back during World War II with her teammate Starman... Who was married. But that’s not all! Her boyfriend, Green Arrow, was raped by Shado, the woman who nursed him back to health after some serious injuries, and then later had his child. And then later, once Green Arrow and Black Canary were married, she thought she was hooking up with GA, but it was actually a shapeshifter named Everyman, who she ended up killing on their wedding night. Point being? I don’t know... Don’t be a comic book character?