HBO Unveils Game of Thrones: Season 2 Cast Photos!

Written by: Brandon Freeberg & Charlie Norwood

WARNING: MINOR SPOILERS BELOW.

YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.

DON'T SAY WE DIDN'T TELL YOU.

Winter Came! Yesterday! Casting was announced a while ago but HBO has unloaded a pile of new photos and we got our first look at the new characters joining the show for the second season of Game of Thrones. Check out below Stannis Baratheon and his firey priestess, Melisdandre; The Onion Knight, Davos Seaworth and Westeros’ token hottie, Brienne of Tarth. Also included were new photos of your most hated characters like Sansa, Cersei and Bran. But there are also new images of Emmy winner Peter Dinklage as Tyrion, and Hodor! So that’s cool. We’re assuming that most of you are impatient nerds like us and have read ahead so you’re already familiar with these new characters but we’ll try to avoid any obvious spoilers where possible.  Everyone dies in the end of this season anyway so I don’t know why we even bother.

First up is Carice Van Houton as Melisandre and her wannabe king, Stannis Baratheon played by Stephen Dillane. She’s been aptly ‘kissed by fire’ (…everywhere, fellas). But Stannis has hair in all the wrong places; we were hoping for a sweet ‘stache and a cue ball that we can set our watches to. On the other hand gold s@#!ting Tywin Lannister wasn't supposed to be bald, but how can you call foul when they casted Charles Dance to play him?  I mean, that guy played Benedict in ‘Last Action Hero.’ BENEDICT!

Liam Cunningham as Davos AKA The Onion Knight AKA The most sea-worthy of the Seaworths. A smuggler that was elevated to baller knight status by Stannis after he did something to help defeat the Targaryens (these books, who can keep up?) Anyway, just based on looks and past roles this was our favorite casting of the new season. And we got a insider tip from RR himself that Liam “went all method on that ass” (his words) and had 4 of his fingers surgically taken down do the joint. Don’t worry, the process is fully reversible, just not FDA approved…or legal for that matter.

Brienne of Tarth played by Gwendoline Christie. She’s not quite as busted in the face as the book would have you believe, which was a bit of surprise.  Granted she’d always get a “kill” vote if it came down to “marry, f@#$, or kill”, and she IS appropriately large and androgynous.

Patrick Malahide as Balon Greyjoy. HBO really nailed the casting with this miserable piece of s@#$. Balon is the father of Theon and lord of the Iron Islands and he just hates everyone and everything, he’s like the Ron Paul of Westeros.  Even though we’ve finished the fifth book already, we’ve got a good feeling about this guy hanging around for multiple seasons ***SPOILER…or is it?***

And here are some new photos of the regulars from Season 2:

Hodor! Hodor! Hodor!Hodor! Hodor! Hodor!

Arya 2.0 (aka BOY mode) and Needle: “Stick ‘em with the pointy end.”

Cat Stark missing Ned and making bad decisions.

Cersei looking frustrated (politically and sexually)

Danarys Targaryan minus dragons, plus clothes, aaaand we’ve lost interest.

Joffrey enjoying the Iron Throne, for now…. Bwahahahahha *diabolical laugh* Oh wait, spoilers. Sorry.

Renly Baratheon, not being king. Not pictured: Knight of Flowers (he’s under the table). ZING!

Robb Stark, now with grown-man facial hair and still draped in the finest dire chinchilla fur in Westeros.

Sansa Stark crying and being useless.  Man was she wrong about Joffrey.  Hindsight, right?

Theon Greyjoy

Tyrion

George R.R. Martin Talks 'Game of Thrones' Season 2