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'Home Alone' Is Now 100% Ruined After Reading This Satanic Fan Theory

The Polka King of the Midwest is actually the devil.

"Home Alone" celebrated its 25th anniversary earlier this month, which means the holiday classic's been entertaining audiences for a quarter of a century. Or so we thought.

Kevin McCallister's (Macaulay Culkin) pranks probably totally killed people, and he most likely grew up to become Jigsaw from the "Saw" films. So, while "Home Alone" is generally seen as a charming movie to watch with family at Christmas, the Internet's unearthed some seriously dark theories about the film.

Reddit user drewgarr recently added to the darkness with his satanic fan theory. He posterized Kate McCallister (Catherine O'Hara) actually sold her soul to the devil to get back to her son. "Who's the devil?," you ask? Well...

20th Century Fox / Monique Steele / MTV

Yep, Gus Polinski (John Candy) is actually the devil in disguise. Who knew being in a polka band was just a front for his evil ways?

  • For starters, Kate straight-up admits to the overworked airline representative, "If I have to sell my soul to the devil himself, I am going to get home to my son."
    20th Century Fox

    Drewgarr mentions, "Just as she says [the phrase]...we now see Gus take notice of Kate and approach her before the airline rep can further help her in any way possible."

  • Kate is stranded at the Scranton airport, which is located right at a crossroads.
    20th Century Fox

    Drewgarr linked out to this pic for clarification. For those familiar with "Supernatural," you can easily see where he's going with this. For those who still don't have a clue, he states, "In a nutshell [the Crossroads Demon myth] means that you can give an offering to the devil (in this case her soul) near a crossroads, [and] the devil will show up and deliver it in exchange for the offering."

    So basically, Kate would agree to sell her soul to the devil if he could get her back to Kevin ASAP. Of course, Drewgarr doesn't mention anything about a 10-year deadline, complete with Hellhounds, but whatevs.

  • The final moment of this scene is when Kate permanently seals her hellish fate.
    20th Century Fox

    "Gus offers Kate a ride to Chicago (to what she was willing to sell her soul for) to which she agrees to, essentially selling her soul. It is at this moment Gus smiles and points out to his friend renting the van, showing her he is honoring his side of deal since she already put up her side (already agreed to a ride for her soul). It is here where she says, "Yes," and [in] the next scene we see that she did in fact accept the ride."

    That's all she wrote, Kate. You may have left your son home alone, winning you the Worst Mother of the Year award, but selling your soul to get him back now makes you Best Mother of the Year.

  • Gus also plays a woodwind instrument, which is apparently Satan's favorite.
    20th Century Fox
    "One last piece of evidence that I have found is Gus choice of instrument. Sure it's not as obvious as a fiddle, instead it's a woodwind instrument. There are some references in the bible that one of the instruments are created and favored by the devil (my understanding at least)," drewgarr stated. He linked out to this WTF blog post about how humans only want to do ~dirty~ things with woodwind instruments and God doesn't approve. Um, OK.

Sorry, Kevin. Your mom's not there. She sold her soul to the devil because you had to go be a little sh-t and ruin everyone's Christmas vacation.

20th Century Fox

H/T Reddit