By Stefan Doyno
I don’t know if you guys have been keeping up with world news, but there are some serious issues going on right now. And by serious, I mean mermaids.
Can you believe that Katy Perry had the audacity to steal the “mermaid” idea from Lady Gaga? Yeah well, neither can I. But now the tables have turned, with Bette Midler calling Gaga out for dressing up as the mythical creature as well. The veteran singer even went on a bit of a Twitter rant defending her originality.
“I’m not sure @ladygaga knows that I’ve performed my mermaid in a wheelchair for millions of people — and many of them are still alive…..” Middler tweeted on Friday. She later added, “Dear @ladygaga Ive been doing singing mermaid in a wheelchair since 1980-You can keep the meat dress and the firecracker t*ts-mermaid’s mine.”
Whoa. Let’s all calm down.
Obviously mythical creatures are all the rage right now, so here are some original ideas that won’t get Lady Gaga into so much trouble!
Also known as the Abominable Snowman. The Yeti is an ape-like cryptid that inhabits the Himalayan region of Tibet, Nepal and India. If anyone can pull this off, it’s Gaga. Just imagine a lot of white fur.
Forget the wacky shoes, if it’s height she desires, then a Centaur is what she needs. The Centaur is an Ancient Greek creature that has a human upper body while the lower half consists of horse. It can be done. She hatched from an egg. It’s not like we’re reaching for the stars here.
This one means “goat-sucker.” The creature has been “spotted” in Puerto Rico, Mexico, and even the United States. It gets its name from its habit of drinking the blood of livestock, especially goats. I see this as being a huge crowd pleaser. BACK. OFF. PETA.
With all of this “Harry Potter” craze going on right now, why not cash in? Take a page from Dobby, the lovable elf that sacrificed his life for Harry. The little monsters love a fearless leader and sacrifice.
If none of these suggestions work out for Gaga, she could always just dress up as Bette Midler.
What mythical creature would you like to see Lady Gaga dress up as next? Let us know in the comments below!