Far be it from me to nitpick something as insignificant as an album title (or, you know, a baby name), especially when said album title was introduced by an illustrated raccoon with blood coming out of its mouth, but, uh, It’s Blitz is kind of a lousy title. It’s goofy, it rhymes, and it doesn’t really make an ounce of sense. And, yeah, I’m aware that the YYYs chose to name their last album after “what happens when you put your finger in a light socket,” so this might not be the most important thing in the world to them.
Still, I’d be remiss if I didn’t offer Karen O and company a handful of better album titles, partially because I am a concerned YYYs fan, but also because I have nothing better to do. Also, since Blitz doesn’t come out until the spring, there’s still plenty of time to change things up if they want (just keep the killer raccoon, please).
So here are a few alternate titles I’ve come up with, plus some handy explanations why I chose each. YYYou’re welcome in advance.
» Ritz Bits, because they are delicious.
» NFL Blitz, because I used to smoke a lot and play this game 22 hours a day in college.
» It’s Myst, because I used to smoke a lot and play this game 22 hours a day in college too. Hi, Mom!
» It’s Schlitz, because the bull is back, baby!
» Miss Bliss, because without Hayley Mills, there would be no Zack Morris, no A.C. Slater, nay, no Samuel “Screech” Powers.
» It’s (Larry) Fitz(gerald), because he single-handedly guided my fantasy-football team to a fourth-place finish this year.
» It’s Diz McNally, because “Out of Control” is an underrated gem, and because I spent my prepubescent years attempting to imitate Diz’s ear-shattering yelp thingy.
» WZBX – 99.7 FM: The Blitz, because we love the antics of Bob & Tom in the morning! (Cue “b-o-o-o-i-n-g!” sound effect.)
» It’s Blitzen Trapper, because they’re better than Fleet Foxes.
» Merriweather Post Pavilion, because it worked so well for Animal Collective.