When reading tonight’s “Vampire Diaries” episode title, “Stand by Me,” I started thinking about that lovely song by the same name. And then I stopped singing and started crooning. Well, I wouldn’t exactly call it crooning; I don’t think Ben E. King would either. It was more like me trying to sing to recapture my former high school glee club glory days. Except my name isn’t Will Schuester, and I’m not a fictional character (as far as I know), so I guess it wasn’t like that. It wasn’t really like that at all.
Anyway, the whole reason I told you that irrelevant story was to begin a discussion on the episode’s title. And now I’m going to end it: Elena needed everyone to stand by her. And they did, obviously. Except she didn’t. Stand by them, that is. Not really. And why, may you ask? Well, because of this:
Exhibit A: Yep. Elena was pretty much delusional for the first 45 minutes of this episode. She just couldn’t accept (and honey, neither could I) that Jeremy died. Was Stefan holding his dead body Marissa Cooper style not a tip-off? (I mean, why Julie and Kevin? WHY?!) I mean, she really thought that Gilbert ring would bring him back to life, even though we all know it only works on non-supernatural folk. And, since Jeremy was one of The Five, he became supernatural. But Elena was convinced that the fact that his hunter tattoos disappeared somehow proved that there was hope; that maybe he was no longer supernatural, or a member of The Five. And I’m all for hope, Elena, but that was just wishful thinking or poor logic, or both (I guess). Because it sure seemed like homeboy was dead. Especially when she poured lighter fluid over her house and lit a match, burning Jeremy’s body and his drawings and her diaries (SHE’S BURNING THE SHOW! SHE’S BURNING THE SHOW!). But I digress. We’ll get to that later.
Exhibit B: I’m going to keep going with this delusion theme, because I think Bonnie’s become bat-sh– crazy, as well. As the episode opened, Stefan had taken Jeremy’s dead body and Elena back to Mystic Falls, leaving Damon on the island to look for the missing Bonnie. Well, the missing Bonnie was hanging with Shane, except it seemed like it wasn’t really Shane at all, but Silas inhabiting Shane’s body. Wait. Are you upset that we’re going back to the whole Klaus was in Alaric’s freaking body thing? Well, don’t be! I can’t be completely sure yet; (according to a “numerologist” I met recently, my clairvoyant powers won’t be at their height until tomorrow), but it looks like Silas just takes the form of other people in hallucinations. If only Jeremy was there to tell Bonnie he couldn’t see him! Then that would’ve solved all our problems. But, obviously, that didn’t happen. Anyway, Bonnie learned that she needed to kill 12 people to do the third massacre and complete the expression circle for Silas. After which, the veil to the other side would be broken. Qetsiyah apparently created the other side because she knew Silas would want to die to be with his one true love. She made it impossible for him by creating a purgatory for the supernatural, something his true love was not. Anyway, if this veil was to break, the other side would cease to exist. Every supernatural someone would just live in the normal world. I didn’t really buy Bonnie going for this, but Silas-as-Shane (I think?) convinced Bonnie—after she was righteously running away, raising her voice about how against it she was—to go through with this plan. And then she told everyone and they think she needs to go to the loony bin and then Silas/Shane showed up at her door acting even more like a creepy cult leader than usual, and something was off, and then we flashed over to the island (it’s not a flash forward guys, although I’d see why you’d be confused as to the fact that this show has a Smoke Monster inhabiting people’s bodies), Ian Somerhalder, and the others. And Rebekah was there, and Shane looked dead, and he grabbed her and said “Silas,” and we knew that he was there and not here, and my mind was blown.
Exhibit C: Katherine killed Jeremy by feeding him to Silas, who drained him of his blood because he was, like, frozen for a century or whatever, and then we’re guessing she took the cure to use as a bargaining chip with Klaus for her freedom. Er, freedom from what? Katherine has been running from Klaus for 500 years! This is a very foreign concept to me, because our beloved characters hang out with Klaus basically every day, and no matter how often he threatens them or whatever, he never kills them. What the heck is she so afraid of? Stop running, you fool. I thought you guys solved it the last time, when you watched that manwitch put Klaus in ALARIC’S FREAKING BODY. Maybe not, but still, I’m embarrassed for you, Kat. I thought you was da man, but the fact that you’ve been running from Klaus for 500 years and our heroes (for the most part) have known him for like a day makes me laugh.
Exhibit D: Caroline left three voicemails for Tyler in the course of one day, which apparently took place a day after he left town to run from Klaus (which is different than the Katherine situation, because he actually wants to kill Tyler, as opposed to I’m-pretty-sure-he-forgot-about-Katherine.) Anyway, Tyler didn’t answer, so he’s obviously over you, Car. OK, kidding, but you asked him to come back because you needed him, and that was a wee selfish, considering Klaus wants him dead yesterday.
Exhibit E: Damon thought it’d be a good idea to sire-bond-compel Elena to turn off her emotions. Once she actually realized Jeremy was dead, (April Young is good for something! April: Can I speak to Jeremy? Elena: He can’t come to the phone right now. *Realization dawning on her* He’s dead.) she was more hysterical than we’ve ever really seen her be. So she was crying and crying and throwing and throwing and scrambling and scrambling, and feeling all the pain of the memories of her loved ones, and then Damon told her to turn it off, and her tears went dry and her eyes went creepy. And then she put lighter fluid all over her house and lit the match like we talked about earlier. And they told her there were other options; they told her she’d want these memories. But she, very simply, disagreed. And walked out of that burning house like a BAMF. Flames were everywhere. It was meant to be epic, with a song lyric saying, “Am I just a spark?”
Hmm, what else? OH! That hunter guy Vaughn said that Katherine had tracked him in Colorado, and told him about the cure and Silas. And found out this info from (dun dun dun) Hayley. And they said something about New Orleans which is totally a plug for the backdoor pilot.
Matt took Elena to the stoner pit (although I didn’t see the van). He showed her some graffiti which they mistook for modern art, and talked about its various attributes. I’m just kidding; Jeremy had written J + V, I think Vicki had written her name. There’s hope, man, according to Matt. We’ll see.
Blah blah blah there’s probably more but that’s why I need your help! Tell me what I’ve missed (if it’s important). What did you think of the episode? Will we be seeing more of Vaughn, Katherine and Hayley? In next week’s previews, Elena’s out of control. How long will she stay that way? Can Damon just re-sire-bond-compel her to feel again? Don’t you think the fact that Stefan said that Elena grieves more powerfully than anyone else is a little ridiculous and untrue and although meant to be a given, silly? When’s Rebekah leaving the island? Where art thou Klaus? What was all that nonsense about Silas’s faceplate and how we won’t recognize him when it seems like he just copies the forms of others? Tweet me or comment below!