‘True Blood’ Season Five Finale Recap: ‘Save Yourself’

Russell Edgington suffered the true death (finally!), Sheriff Bellefleur became a daddy (four times over!), while Bill showed us his teeth (and not in a good way). In short, it was everything you’d expect from a “True Blood” season finale. Let’s get to it.

The fae way
The episode picked up right where last week’s penultimate left off, with Russell high on faerie blood and headed straight for the enchanted ones’ lair. Despite hurling all of the light at him, the fae could not deter him, and it looked as though the villainous vamp would break through until Eric sneaked up behind him and staked him good, finally exacting the vengeance he’d so longed for. Sookie ran to make sure Jason was okay after being blasted, which left her momentarily vulnerable to Eric’s “sister” Nora. In a nice throwback to an earlier episode, Nora asked what Sookie was, to which Eric replied, “She’s a waitress.” He then recruited Sookie for his Vampire Authority rescue mission, with Jason (who was seeing visions of his parents) in tow.

With the faerie population momentarily safe, it was the perfect moment (if ever there could be a perfect moment for something like this) for Andy’s magical baby mama to give birth at Merlotte’s. Uping the awkward factor, Andy’s current flame, Holly, who had just learned of the impending birth, helped deliver the babies. Yes, babies, plural. Because Maurella gave birth to not one, not two, not three, but FOUR children. And let’s just say the experience seemed to have been more ecstasy than agony for the faerie. Seconds after the last one popped out, Maurella hopped off the pool table and out of the bar, leaving Andy to raise his new brood. Facebook butt shots are clearly the least of the lawman’s worries now.

Top dog
Alcide also took on a new role in this episode: that of packmaster. After Rikki was brought to him with an apparent V overdose and tales of the Shreveport packmaster’s mistreatment, Alcide decided it was time to get rid of the goon for good. Which he did, assuming his rightful place as packmaster.

Bye, bye, Bill?
Meanwhile, major ish was going down at Vampire Authority HQ. Sam was brought in as Bill’s breakfast, but before the former king could get so much as an incisor into the shapeshifter, Sam transformed into a fly and buzzed off to help Luna and her doggie daughter escape. Luna risked skinwalking again, shifting into Steve Newlin’s form to take his pet for a walk, but instead of the front door, the reverend was shown to a TV studio to give a live address. Midway through, Luna shifted back into her natural form. Live television—so unpredictable!

Back to Bill: he admitted to Salome that he offed Kibwe because he tried drinking all of Lilith’s blood, which wouldn’t have been right seeing as the goddess selected Salome as her chosen one. All of it, however, was just a ploy to get Salome to drink the blood herself, which Bill cleverly laced with silver. One big gulp of Lilith’s life force, and Salome was writhing on the floor, giving Bill the opportunity to stake her.

At the same time, Eric, Nora, Sookie, Jason and Tara had infiltrated Authority headquarters, with Jason picking off the undead one by one in grand Rambo fashion. The group tracked down Jessica and Pam, and upon the Fantasia proprietor’s release, she and progeny Tara shared a passionate liplock. “I knew it!” Jess exclaimed. With their friends safely released, the group made for the exit, but Sookie and Eric stayed behind to go after Bill.

With impeccable timing as always, the duo walked in on Bill just as he was about to throwback the vial of Lilith’s blood. Sookie tried using Bill’s one-time love for her to convince him not to go down the forsaken path, but it was all for not. He drank the liquid, which turned him into a pile of goo. But like Lilith, he rose, reborn and ferocious. And there’s your cliffhanger.

What did you think of last night’s season five finale? What are your expectations for season six? Sound off in the comments and on Twitter!