So when Ryan and Cate’s therapist suggested they "take some time apart," neither spouse mentioned the fact that they not only lived together, but they work together—I guess the eight hours a night they sleep apart will have to be the time spent healing their relationship while they bicker and stare daggers at each other the rest of the day. Somehow this technique works though, at the end of the day, a very ragged-looking Ryan and unnervingly fresh-faced Cate decide to give their marriage another, another shot.

Cate and Ryan's decision was the only good news (if you are into them as couple) to come out of the episode. Poor Lux. Even reunited with her biological parents and best friend, this orphan just can’t catch a break. Still "dating" her teacher, Eric bribes her to get an MRI to look deeper into the cause of her learning disability by offering to set up their own private homecoming at Tasha’s pad, complete with spiked punch. (I’m sure serving alcohol to a minor will be a blip on the arrest warrant issued when E is undoubtedly caught sleeping with his 16-year-old student.)

But Baze is always around to screw up Lux’s life for his own best interest (masquerading as her best interest.) See, MRIs and special learning disability teachers are expensive, and even though Cate’s gig as a local radio show producer seems wildly (and suspiciously) lucrative and Baze’s dad owns an entire investment fund, Baze is still hard up for cash. So he makes a rather unfair deal with his girlfriend/boss that if he can sign a new wealthy client, they will split the bonus and he can pay Tiny Tim’s medical bills. Emma tries to explain that she can’t leave her troubled youth son Sam home alone or he will Hoover the medicine cabinet, but Baze pays no mind. He sets Sam up with Lux to go to homecoming, where the kids will have a wholesome, responsible night out. Sam manages to find a joint rather quickly, getting himself and Lux caught by a teacher.

Cate comes down to the school to pick up the delinquents, sending Sam to her car with the keys and confronting Lux on what actually happened with her foster mom Valerie. After the MRI revealed Lux had a stroke in the seventh grade, Cate realized Lux was hiding something about her past and with Tasha’s help, she tracked down Valerie. Valerie painted a picture of a loving home, but a violent, lying Lux. Cate didn’t know who to believe, sending Lux running out of the school and stealing Cate’s car. Is everyone still with me?! I think we’ve gotten through half of the episode!

Lux confronts Valerie and reminds her that it was her husband that was the violent, pushing Lux down the stairs and punching her chest. On cue, Violent Husband emerges to physically remove Lux from his property by her hair. An angry dog pulls at his leash and Tasha finds a shovel to strike the man over the head. But that’s not all!

Tasha, Lux and Sam make a run for it in the car. Lux doesn’t know how to drive, Tasha doesn’t want to go back to juvie and Sam realizes his life story is chicken sh-- compared to these two and he tries to leap from a moving vehicle. Of course they crash. Of course no one is injured, and Ryan picks them up and actually drops Tasha off to sleep alone in her apartment and hopefully not succumb to a concussion.

Sam covers for Lux and all the parents realize that maybe they don’t know anything about their children. Emma decides that boarding school may not be the best option for Sam, and she enrolls him the very next day into Lux’s school. It takes Sam five minutes to realize Lux is dating her teacher. As if he didn’t have enough of her secrets to hold against her.

Will Sam be friend or foe? And did Tasha have to take down all of Eric’s lame balloons and streamers before she went to bed after nearly killing a man? Could anything more have happened in this episode? Oh, Baze played bad music on a piano and landed his deal and Emma admitted she was jealous of him because women hate her and love him.

I could actually go on, but I think that’s enough for this week. Thank god for Thanksgiving.

What did you think of last night's insane "Life Unexpected"?