Happy Wedding Anniversary, Bella and Edward! Here’s An Itinerary For Your Special Day

OME, today is Bella and Edward’s one year wedding anniversary! Move over, cute Rob and Kristen in Montreal pictures, because we’ve got some much more important stuff to talk about; namely, planning the anniversary festivities!

Keep in mind that Bella has now been a vampire for a little under a year, so some of the reminiscing to human times might feel a little forced. But this is this first of many hundreds of anniversaries to come, so they have to set the bar as high as possible. When you’re a vampire with infinite time ahead of you, what else is there to do but plan? Just ask Alice.

10:00 am : For breakfast, Bella surprises Edward with a mountain lion. It was always his favorite.

11:15 am: The happy couple heads to Forks, Wash. to say hey to Charlie, but more importantly to borrow some of his landscaping materials. That meadow won’t mow itself!

11:45 am: They’re vampires, of course they are able to beautifully maintain a now-overgrown meadow in under a half an hour, and plant more of those pretty blue flowers. After their exertion landscaping, Bella and Edward then commence in some activities that will never make it into the movies. Sorry, fans!

12:15 pm: Bella and Edward run to Forks Airport (there is one, we looked it up!) to hop on Carlisle’s private jet, Air Isle Esme. During the three hour turbo flight, Bella and Edward pass the time by staring longingly into each others’ eyes.

3:30 pm: What is a trip to Isle Esme without some broken headboards and Bella being covered in feathers? Carlisle isn’t as forgiving this time around, and demands Edward fork up the cash to replace the vintage bed frame Carlisle stole from Versailles for Esme’s birthday (but really to replace the last one Edward and Bella broke).

4:00 pm: Sure it was a short visit to the Caribbean, but Bella and Edward will do anything for an excuse to stare deeply into each others’ golden eyes for another three hours.

7:15 pm: The duo meet up with their one-year-old-but-really-sort-of-much-older daughter Renesmee and Bella’s ex/Renesmee’s soulmate Jacob Black for a double date at Bella Italia, despite the fact none of them eat human food. Bella throws a hissy fit when she finds out the mushroom ravioli is sold out for the day, and leaves a crappy tip for the waitress, who just happens to be the same one from the first time they went to the restaurant and still drools over Edward.

8:00 pm: Alice is sitting on the roof of Edward’s 2011 Volvo when they leave the restaurant, and berates Bella for letting us plan the anniversary instead of her. She then gives Bella and Edward their present: La Belvedere mansion in Bel Air, Calif. All that “European family” stuff was just a cover up.

8:30 pm: Commence more long, passionate staring as Bella and Edward fly Air Isle Esme to their new home, which just so happens to have a mini airport on the premises.

9:45 pm: Bella and Edward retire to their new home, and look forward to many more wedding anniversaries and broken bedframes to come.

If you could give Bella and Edward one thing for their wedding anniversary, what would it be?