Everyone’s favorite creep show, “Pretty Little Liars,” was on last night and while there weren’t as many mysterious text messages, there was no lack of suspense, scary moments in the woods or inappropriate relations between high school girls and the men that love them.
After their intense car make-out last week, Aria was under the impression Mr. Fitz was now her kind-of-real boyfriend that could accompany her to gallery openings and caress pinkies in school. Fitzy reminded her that he is still her teacher, but they will be together soon enough when he stalks her in his car again. But when Aria realizes the woman her father had an affair with — a tall, leggy blond and rabid “Bones” fan who fares from Tree Hill — is making moves on her dad again, she just can’t wait for him to pull up in his Honda. She goes to directly to Fitz’s apartment (has she been there before?), but he tells her to run back outside and pick a street to walk down and he’ll hop in the car to find her. When her eyes fill with tears and he tells her, OK, just this once …
Spencer finds herself in the awkward situation of being the reason her sister’s engagement is called off and as much as she tries to explain that the fiancé kissed her, her family doesn’t believe it. Spence goes through the torture of watching her sister suffer and attempt to comfort herself by throwing away stacks of bridal mags (Rosewood needs a serious recycling initiative) and re-reading all of her high school AP papers. Break-ups are tough. We’ve all been there. But wait, was that a paper on Russia?
Detective Wilden is still hot on the case of Alison’s death, hunting in the school yearbooks in between his dinners and showers with H’s mom. There are boxes full of Alison’s stuff on the curb down the street, but he’s a professional right? He’s probably got the right idea. And he did notice that Hanna was chubby and wore her hair differently freshman year. It wasn’t a cute look. And you know what girls do to look cute these days: They kill. Yeah, he’s on to something. Unfortunately when he doesn’t produce a search warrant to rifle through Hanna’s purse, her mom draws the line and kicks him out. She re-applies her lipstick and heads down to Rosewood’s outpost of Bergdorf’s. She’s so silly, it’s the store that has the power to press charges. She wasted a week sleeping with the wrong guy. Now where’s the manager?
Meanwhile, the girls all try to blow off some steam at a party. Hanna tries again to seduce her boyfriend and is again denied. Emily, newly single after her boyfriend tried to have sex with her in the girls’ locker room (and was stopped by Jenna’s stepbrother, Toby), finally gives into her desires and kisses Maya — on film, in a photo booth. The pics are immediately stolen and reprinted by a mystery person in black gloves. And aside from the creep-factor and potentially ruining Emily’s life, that wall of photos was pretty cool.
And Toby Cavanaugh — hero or monster? Played by three different actors, (just to keep it interesting) he returns from reform school to be his sister’s escort. Who needs specialty schools for disturbed youth or the blind when you can just stick the two together and keep everyone out of trouble? He took the blame for burning the shed his sis was blinded in because Alison had some kind of dirt on him (obvs). So he’s bad. But he helped Emily … so he’s good? The mystery continues.
And the girls return to the woods with bags of stuffed animals and other hiking necessities to reconnect with Alison (and find another shed? The amount of sheds, both burned and standing, in this show has me needing Google Maps). And, again, they hear scary noises and try to chase after whatever it is, only to come across Alison’s bracelet. Now that is some detective work …
Oh yeah, and in case you didn't get the memo: everyone should get a KIN. It’s really the only way to be harassed by the dead.
What did you think of last night's episode of "PLL"? Were you as weirded out/intrigued by Toby as I was? Do you think the same person putting up Emily's makeout photos is also "A"? Finally, where do you think the locating of Alison bracelet will lead?