'90210' Recap: Episode 45, 'Javianna'

Welcome back West Bevvers! We’re one episode away from the "90210" finale and the storylines are heating up. Let’s dive right in.

More in love than ever, Silver and Teddy got hot in heavy in the halls and the bedroom (or that tool shed in the backyard Silver lives in), but as Spence Montgomery has been trying to warn them: tennis and love do not mix. Teddy’s “mattress mambo” left him out of step and out of a number one spot. So after going all the way, Silver found herself caving into Spence’s demand that she break up with Teddy. Now he may have a shot at being Roger Federer again, but I kind of doubt it. (And for the record, Federer has a wife and kids, so obviously some people can do the “mambo” and still win.)

The Battle of the Navids continued as Latin Navid (aka Javier) wined and dined Adrianna and Real Navid Googled the resulting paparazzi pictures. Realizing her can’t give Aid a proper celebrity hybrid name — Javianna, they are so hot right now — Navid resorted to the one thing he did have: History. He leaves a charm bracelet of memories — a little hamburger, a miniature adoption certificate, a small-scale replica of the rehab facility he paid for — in Aid’s dressing room and waits for her to meet him on the roof.

Oh, but that Latin Navid is so good! Before Aid can even walk into her dressing room he has swept her away to duet with him in New York.

The Wilson clan continues their run for Unhappiest Home Award as Dixon sells everything he owns to try to earn enough money so he can get out of the house and spend the summer with Ivy in Australia, Annie is confronted with her subtle “I KILLED UNCLE” letter and Harry and Aunt Becky show how setting the table can be an angry task. I hope they aren’t paying too much for therapy. And oh snap – Jasper’s back! Can you smell that? It’s Annie’s confession. It’s. So. Close.

Naomi finds herself cut off financially by Jen who cancels her credit cards and swaps her Benz for a beat up Ford. Hell-bent on finding more revenge dirt on her sister to blackmail her back into giving her money, Liam finally snaps. Did any of you even remember these two were still dating? Naomi promises to change her ways and be there for Liam and that lasts about 20 minutes, when he calls her in a desperate need to talk after her finds out his coin heist cost the maid her job. Naomi claims she has the flu (Liam deserves her for buying that) and chases Jen straight into the OB/GYN where she finally finds out Jen is with child. Not only that, Jen has magically grown a giant baby bump literally overnight. Hmm, I’ve seen this before. Didn’t this happen to Bella? Could Jen be having a half-vampire baby!? Was that assistant named Jacob? Are we in Forks? I’m so confused. "Twilight," "Twilight," "Twilight" …

Phew. Okay, I’m back. Thanks Dix, a cup of warm vodka really does make everything better. Now where’s the broom closet …

What did you think of last night's "90210"? Were you saddened by Silver's breakup? What about Real Navid's heartbreak? Were you as shocked to see Jen had a baby bump that no one noticed last week, too?