Retail Therapy: Merch To Help You Mourn The Ryan Gosling Baby News

Ain’t it the truth.
Photo: Nasty Gal

I’m sure you’ve heard the news by now. Ryan Gosling is rumored to be having a baby with Eva Mendes. Also rumored to be true: my inability to love ever again. For those of you who are coming to terms with the debilitating news, I’m here you for you. And in the spirit of solidarity, I’ve found a couple of items to ease the grieving process as you walk along your very own boulevard of broken dreams.

Depending on your level of acceptance, there are two ways of approaching this devastating devlopment. There’s the mature path of calm acceptance. Sure, Ryan Gosling isn’t with you and you’re dealing with a wellspring of emotions, but you’re sophisticated enough to know that this is your life now. However, that doesn’t mean you’ve entirely recovered. You’d still like to be handled with kid gloves until you’re fully healed. Thankfully, Nasty Gal is on it.

The online retailer has a “Ryan Gosling Broke My Heart” tee to telegraph your emotional state to the world at large. Wear it with everything: cutoffs, an adorable skirt, underneath a smart suit set—anything but boyfriend jeans, because that word is probably still a trigger for you.

If you’d rather pretend that the entire thing didn’t happen and live in a state of denial, there’s Etsy. And this Ryan Gosling body pillow. For $26, you can pretend the whole thing was just a bad dream and curl up with your very own portable boyfriend. There’s also a shirtless version.

Hey girl, I would never break your heart.
Photo: Etsy

Just imagine having your very own Canadian dreamboat that will never break your heart or leave you. Your very own Lars and the Real Girl: Part II.

If you need me, I’ll be eating pints of ice cream alone while listening to this on repeat. We could have had it all, RyGos.


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