If you care at all about TV, you’re likely well-aware that the second season of Orange Is The New Black premieres this week (June 6) on Netflix. Gearing up for the return of Piper, Pennsatucky, Crazy Eyes and the rest of the women’s penitentiary motley crew of characters, we’re binge-watching the first season as a refresher and looking ahead at the new season’s character posters for what’s to come. In keeping with the first season’s creative interpretations on beauty/style necessities—maxi pads as shower shoes, etc.—we noticed that these teaser images employ similarly scrappy DIY takes on beauty routines.
~Naturally~, we felt it our duty to test these unique approaches out, so for the pilot episode of our brand new tutorial series, How To Do Stuff (P.S. we’re launching a tutorial series!!!), we decided to do just that. Watch the video above for some valuable information on whether tampons work as hair curlers, if a Sharpie marker can pass as eyeliner, and soooooo much more.
Taystee’s poster shows her curling her hair with tampons. I wrapped my own hair in tampons and left them on for, like, half a day. NO SPOILERS: You’ll have to watch the video to see whether it worked or not. *WINK*
SANDPAPER NAIL FILE
Red uses super-fine sandpaper to buff and file her nails—a pretty aggressive approach to manicures but whatever.
KITCHEN SPONGE + KNIFE MIRROR
Gloria substitutes a kitchen sponge to apply her foundation and uses a meat cleaver as a mirror. I don’t own a meat cleaver, but I’m pretty sure I was still able to accurately test it out with the knife I had access to.
Alex Vause, Piper’s ex-girlfriend, uses Sharpie as eyeliner. It’s a thing absolutely no one should do. Ever. But I did it, so you don’t have to. Find out whether I’m currently blind and dictating this post to someone in the video!
PIE FACE MASK
Everybody loves Crazy Eyes. Me too. So, I channeled her and put cherry pie filling on my face to see if it did anything. You’re welcome.
My personal OITNB fave (also, the current cover star of Time) Sophia (Laverne Cox) rounds out our tutorials with her interpretation on the Little Mermaid dingle hopper idea with a plastic lunch fork and her own saliva as gel.
Watch our tutorial for the full deets on how to do your makeup and hair like the ladies from Orange Is The New Black, and comment with suggestions for the next episode of How To Do Stuff!