Anna Wintour shoots Kanye a glance that says, "I'm holding you to what we discussed last night."
Photo: Getty Images/Photoshop: Gaby Wilson
Welcome to Fashion Fanfic, a new franchise we're starting here at MTV Style wherein we take great lengths to fabricate stories about the fashion world's most interesting characters. Don't misunderstand, we're not in the market to stir the pot or circulate gossip. We're doing this because we're SUCH fans of fashion that we have crazy fantasy plot lines somersaulting through our brains at all hours of the day and FINALLY decided we needed a place to put them. Enter North West. We'd toyed with the idea of launching this thing for a while now, but as soon as we heard that the name of Kanye West and Kim Kardashian's first-born daughter, North West, was reportedly approved by Anna Wintour when the Vogue EIC had the couple over for dinner on the eve of the 2013 Met Gala, we knew we had our kick-off story.
Anna checked her reflection in the back of a large serving spoon. Come early May, spring is only just starting to roll around in New York City, which means heat, humidity, and time to swap in a stronger daily anti-frizz serum. The seasonal beauty switch-up is annoying but a necessary evil and one the Vogue editor-in-chief certainly wasn't going to take chances on tomorrow, the day of the Costume Institute Gala. Regardless, Anna wanted to make sure everything was in its exact right place before her guest of honor's arrival. She triple-checked the table settings her assistant had come over to do hours ago, displayed her collection of soul vinyls prominently, and was in the middle of zhuzhing her couch throw pillows when the doorbell rang. "There he is now! Just like clockwork. Fifteen minutes late," she thought to herself, heading toward the door.
"Hello, Kanye!" she said, welcoming Yeezy into her Greenwich Village home.
"It's so good to see you, Anna," he replied, leaning in for a double-cheek fashion kiss, "Thank you for the invitation over."
But the mutual gratitude stopped there as Kanye moved aside to reveal he had brought an unexpected date: his girlfriend and baby mama, Kim Kardashian, with whom Wintour isn't necessarily on the best terms.
"Oh hello, Kim. What a happy surprise," Anna said dryly, glancing back at the dinner table set for two.
Sensing her panic, Kanye encouraged her that they'll just have a low-key evening. "Oh, don't worry about the dinner, Anna. We'll order in. It'll be nice to relax before tomorrow night," he said while picking up and thumbing through a takeout menu left on Wintour's front door by one of the neighborhood sushi restaurants.
"It's an honor to meet you, Ms. Wintour. I've admired your work for years, and Kanye has nothing but wonderful things to say about you," Kim beamed, only to be met with an absent-minded half-smile from Anna whose brain was working in overdrive to stave off the hurricane of emotions coursing under her cool exterior.
"Well, come on in, you two," she said, motioning them in to the living room, "If we're going to really do this casually, we may as well do it correctly. Let's all take a look at the menu and figure out who wants what."
Kanye West and Kim Kardashian head to Anna Wintour's for dinner.
Photo: @KimKardashian's Instagram
The trio made their way through Wintour's Coveteur-ready home to the den and took their seats. Or in Kanye's case, shlepped onto Anna's couch, Yeezys all on her sofa, tossing his backpack to the side. Kim and Kanye were dressed in matching black ensembles; Kanye in a black crewneck sweater with leather pants and fringed sneakers and Kim in custom Prada designed from the label's Spring 2013 collection. Anna couldn't help but assume Kim's outfit was some subversive The Devil Wears Prada jab, nor could she ignore how far along she was in her pregnancy and how it was straining the delicates silks of her garment.
"When is the child due, again?" Anna asked the couple.
"The doctors say around mid-July, so we're getting pretty close!" Kim replied.
"And have you given any thought to what you might name her?"
"DONDA," said Kanye without looking up from the online delivery form as he finished plugging in everyone's orders. (He felt obligated to foot the bill for springing Kim on Anna unannounced.)
"I know how much you miss your mother, but might it get confusing naming your company and your daughter both Donda?" Anna followed up.
"I guess it could just be a middle name," West pouted back, "Speaking of work, I wanted to talk about tomorrow night. I'm going to be debuting some music."
Anna blushed but was quickly snapped out of her girlish reaction, reminded of Kim's presence.
"I'll do one track from the new album called, 'I Am A God,' and another song I'm not sure about yet called 'Awesome.' It's about Kim."
The doorbell rang. "How fast!" Anna exclaimed and headed toward the door, thankful to have been saved from having a conversation with Kanye about Kim that included the word "awesome" in the same breath. When she returned to the living room, Kimye had resurfaced the baby name conversation.
"I still really like Easton West. I think that's cute," Kim said.
"Yeah. It's just such a Hamptons name. No offense, Anna."
"None taken. It does sound a bit like some sort of lacrosse player who uses 'summer' as a verb. A little too cable-knit-pastels-and-seersucker for your taste," Anna replied. She was eager to shut it down because Kim suggested it, but then, realized this might be an opportunity to enact her most dastardly scheme yet. She was going to influence the name of this child. "Kim, didn't I hear you say on Leno that 'North' might be in the running?"
"Oh wow, I can't believe you remembered that. Yes. I'm just not sure that it's right. Isn't it a little on-the-nose? The directional thing is fun which is why I was into 'Easton' because it still feels like a name. 'North' might be a little too overtly 'celebrity baby.'"
"But that's just the thing: she IS a celebrity baby. Or she will be when she's actually born. She should be named accordingly," Anna retorted.
"Yeah, if Big Brother named his daughter after a color, I can name mine after a cardinal direction. The North Star, the North Pole, we live in the Northern hemisphere. And then, we can call her 'Nori' for short!" Kanye added, picking up another salmon avocado roll.