Rooney Mara on ’Late Night with Jimmy Fallon’ in New York on Dec. 19.
Photo: Getty Images
We just have to put it out there—Rooney Mara has been straight-up sartorially brilliant on the red carpet while promoting her film The Girl with Dragon Tattoo as of late, but last night we did a triple take when she showed up on Jimmy Fallon in an unusual frock. This is exactly how our thought process went: “Oh! What a cute off-the-shoulder flared dre—wait a minute, is that nude mesh? Around her décolletage? WAIT, IT’S A MOCK TURTLENECK?! Ahahahah!” You guys, why would she do this to herself? First off, how awkward is it that her dress hits her RIGHT in the middle of her knee cap? It’s an unflattering length on such a lean lady! Then the dress unbeautified (that’s a word) Rooney even further by covering up the prettiest part of her feminine bod—her long neck and delicate clavicle bones. The weirdest/worst part about this whole shebang is that this mock-turtle-neck-’50s-party-dress hybrid thing is actually Rodarte by Opening Ceremony, and it costs $736. Yeah.
Now, is it just us or does this dress kiiinnddd of remind you of a sexy nun costume? The whitish bib, the thick polyester-blend black material, and the severe lack of eye-popping accessories makes us want to throw a habit on her and call it a day. Or better yet, send her off to a senior portrait sesh ’cause she’d have a GRAND ol’ time posing behind white picket fences, hugging tree trunks, and frolicking through prairies in that soccer-mom-meets-vintage-Etsy-girl combo dress. WE ARE SO. CONFUSED. BY. THIS. FROCK. We just wanna take scissors to it and snip that old mockity-mock collar thing right off. But we won’t. You know why? ’Cause we have faith in Rooney. She’ll come back around. She may accidentally get shuffled into a nearby convent in the meantime, but she’ll come back around.