Justin Bieber Advertises Own Perfume On Chest At ESPY Awards

Justin Bieber at the 2011 ESPY Awards in Los Angeles, California, on July 13, 2011.
Photo: Getty Images

If there's one thing Justin Bieber knows how to do, it's how to cater to EVERY DEMOGRAPHIC of women in existence. Last night, at the ESPY Awards show, he channeled Lower East Side gothic nightclub chic for the red carpet but when he hit the stage, his NASCAR-inspired jumpsuit looked straight out of Talladega Nights.

Justin Bieber at the 2011 ESPY Awards in Los Angeles, California, on July 13, 2011.
Photo: Getty Images

When we see Justin Bieber in this race car getup, we imagine him suddenly saying phrases like, "UHHH-MERRCAA" and "GET 'ER DONE." But we kind of enjoy his hat tip to our country's redder states—mostly because the "sponsors" glued to his chest are a peace sign, the entire country of Canada, and, um, himself? THAT'S HIS OWN "SOMEDAY" PERFUME LOGO ON THERE, GUYS. So smart. Soooooo smart. Also, we love that he didn't leave ALL of his Bieberness behind—he's still sporting some glittery kicks.

Justin Bieber at the 2011 ESPY Awards in Los Angeles, California, on July 13, 2011.
Photo: Getty Images

OMG, JUSTIN GET OUT OF THE SUNLIGHT BEFORE YOU BURST INTO FLAMES! Oh wait, he's not a vampire, he's just dressed in all black in the middle of the summertime for fun. When JB walked the carpet, he wore a sparkly, black V-neck sweater, black collared shirt, black dress pant/jean hybrids, silver and gold studded high top sneakers, and YSL belt. The BEST part, though, is his wallet chain, which consists of—get this—a bunch of GOLD HEART-SHAPED LOCKS. AWWW. So goth-y and emoooo. He's officially got every city-dwelling and suburban punk rock teen by her heartstrings.

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