Let's Discuss: Desigual x Cirque Du Soleil Collaboration

Wherever you go, it sees you. Desigual X Cirque Du Soleil tee and a Cirque Du Soleil performer.
Photo: Desigual X Cirque Du Soleil/Getty Images

There are several things that are culturally specific and downright weird about working in Times Square. For example, today we learned that there are two Sephoras about a block and a half apart. We've also walked past the aggressively air-conditioned, unnervingly dark Desigual store and wondered WTF is a Desigual and why is it adored by droves of youngish Europeans? Is it the same thing like how shorts-wearing, loud-talking Americans are constantly being clowned for going to McDonald's in far-off lands? Which then reminds us that there are MULTIPLE MONSTER Desigual ads in the arrivals area of JFK International airport as if to remind visitors the moment they alight long flights that New York features many, many spectacles and historic gems and museums and the opera and scads of brave, brilliant citizens but to NEVER FORGET... that there's a Desigual flagship here. SO WEIRD.

Which brings us (excruciatingly slowly) to the recent news that the Spanish sportswear line (BREAKING: apparently Desigual is a Spanish sportswear line) founded in 1984 by Thomas Meyer is doing a collabo with Cirque Du Soleil, thereby unifying two things that I am 100 percent meh on.

I know that fash nerds will pipe up about the fact that none other than CHRISTIAN LACROIX (sweetie, dahling, sweetie) designed fall 2011 for them, and to that I say, "sure" and also, *shrug* and "FINE THAT ONE SWEATER WAS GREAT" but even still, why this T-shirt? WHHHHHHHHHY? There's something SO sandblasted, lace-up, bell-bottom jeans-ish about it. So Custo Barcelon-ish. I grant that my viewpoint may be myopic, and I appreciate that taste can exist that differs from mine but the SPAZZTASTIC colors and patchwork mishmash that characterizes the brand is sooooo unappealing to my alleyway/wheelhouse. The weird thing is, I don't even know how to solve it. Typically, fuggo things can be unfugged by the simple removal or modification of a feature or silhouette, but IDK how to even begin to attack imagery that is rendered just more ACK! by the addition of clowns. Contorted clowns that look like porcelain-faced dolls with soft bodies that still possess enough gumption to kill you dead in your sleep. The fact that the brand is making money hand over fist, sold in 70 countries with 60 percent growth from 2002-2009 with sales upwards of 250 million Euros in that last year FUHREAKS ME OUT. If you never hear from me again upon publication of this post, YOU'LL KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.