Cover Girl: Beyoncé Is Awesome On ‘Dazed & Confused’

As if we needed another reminder to bow down to the bodaciousness that is Beyoncé, here she stands the blindingly crazy-hot-like-a-solar-flare cover girl for the latest issue of Dazed & Confused. Bey fronts the mag in promotion of her newest album, 4, which leaked three weeks early (#sadface). The consummate professional, Queen B’s response was totally classy and optimistic and the complete antithesis of the hair-ripping tantrum tornado we would have set off were we in her shoes. But I guess when you look and sound and pose in bananasfierce stunning (to where we are doubled over catching our breath at the indescribable, mind-boggling beauty) one-off creations by Gareth Pugh, Tom Ford, Riccardo Tisci, Stefano Pilati, Haider Ackermann and Marc Jacobs for Louis Vuitton like this woman, there’s always WAY more to be thankful for than to lament. More pics from her spread after the jump!

Honestly, who but she could possibly look this damp AND chic outside of an RV? Also, must-have accessories of the moment: a battery-operated mini prop fan and these flats. Plus, STRONGLY considering garter belts in the swampiest part of the summer just to stand out…

Yeah right, like Bey eats Technicolor sugar cereal. Though, were she to, I’m sure it would be with a majestic, sculpted beehive, in a folding lawn chair, watching cartoons on stacked televisions.

Fashion-wise we LOVELOVE everything about this shot. From the retro, peaked sunglasses to the bubblegum to (obvi) the hyper-bright styling to her taut torso to the fact that she probably needed a tetanus shot to before setting her jelly on such a rusted-out, dinged up hoopty. Man, she’s a trooper.

Judging from her “Run The World (Girls)” video looks, it’s safe to assume this is the bespoke Gareth Pugh. We bow deep and long at its majesty. Also, OCD line-centric, nerd-alert but I love how the strap of the animal-print bustier has fallen on the side where she is NOT wearing a gauntlet cuff. Makes our brains feel cool like air conditioner.

I mean… Big Gulp? The high-low on this is so very swoonsome. It’s probably a crisp and delicious Lambrusco and not soda.

As a team we are SPLIT evenly as to whether we care for over-the-knee boots, but it’s Beyoncé, ergo she can do whatever she likes. ESPECIALLY if she likes to pair it with textured, high-waisted granny-hot-panties and a Peter Pan collar with this insane shearling bolero PELT situation.