Battle Royale: The Amazingest vs. The Fugliest Dresses Of The 2011 Met Gala

Last night, the Metropolitan Museum of Art in NYC was host to this year’s Costume Institute Gala, a colossal annual event (think the Academy Awards of high fashion) showcasing the most face-melting designs the fashion community has to offer. This year was no exception, and rightly so given that the theme of the event and the Costume Institute exhibit was ’Alexander McQueen: Savage Beauty’ honoring the late mega-visionary. But you know how they say there’s a fine line between genius and insanity? Well, when you reach for genius/innovative/amazeballs, sometimes you can go too far and start looking a little Crazytown, USA. Here are what we consider the AMAZINGEST and the FUGLIEST dresses of the night.

AMAZINGEST

Rihanna, Christina Ricci, and Florence Welch at the ’Alexander McQueen: Savage Beauty’ Costume Institute Gala at The Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York on May 2.
Photo: Getty Images/Wire Image

ZOMG. Before I even say ANYTHING, I’ll let you take a little time to pop your eyeballs back into your skull. Good? OK. Rihanna looks nasssttyyy (in the very best way, the girl can do no wrong) in a black, lace, embellished, one-shoulder Stella McCartney dress with a peekaboo sheer side-panel, strappy stilettos, and a gloriously long side-braid that makes her look like a Viking GODDESS. Christina Ricci murders the sheer trend in this mind-blowing Zac Posen fishtail gown with the intensely intricate spiderweb overlay. What’s truly incredible about this look is that it’s long-sleeved without looking dowdy AND form-fitting to where bish was obviously sewn into this dress about a week ago with 24-hour bed rest and 0 chewable food stuffs. Florence Welch nails beautiful ethereality in this flowy/satin-y/feather-y Yves Saint Laurent number with the most bangingsome feathered monster boa.

Beyonce, Karolina Kurkova, and Ashley Greene at the ’Alexander McQueen: Savage Beauty’ Costume Institute Gala at The Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York on May 2.
Photo: Getty Images

BeyoncĂ©’s insane curves rock this gold-embroidered black Pucci dress so hard (even though we totally don’t think this looks like a Pucci dress AT ALL, right?). While she was neither ambulatory or obliging for cameras, we gotta say, Bey always works. (Side note: Is anyone else reminded of the flirty featherduster from Beauty and the Beast?) I can barely comprehend what I’m seeing on Karolina Kurkova in this look by Jean Paul Gaultier (lace-paneled leggings? Hi-low-hem? Halter neck AND shoulder straps???), but I know it is FIERCE. And how prettily feminine does Ashley Greene look in Donna Karan’s nude embellished sweetheart neckline gown? If you guessed “very much so,” you would be right.

MAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!!/WHOA, THAT’S TOO BAD/FUGGGGLAAAY

Freida Pinto, Chloë Sevigny, and Andre Leon Talley at the ’Alexander McQueen: Savage Beauty’ Costume Institute Gala at The Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York on May 2.
Photo: Getty Images

Ahhh, and now the garment glorification is over, and we have to discuss the less favorable looks of the night. First up is the tale of Freida Pinto and this white Chanel couture gown wherein a very pretty girl is choked to fugs by a wholly unneccessary hipster neck tie. Another victim of an ill-advised neck adornment is Chloë Sevigny in a short-sleeved Alexander McQueen black lace dress that humiliates every single part of her body in a manner we can’t wrap our brains around. And then there’s Andre Leon Talley in a formal Snuggie/rip-stop nylon-ass looking kaftan. We’re not really sure what this is (cape? Cloak? Robe? Bouncy castle?), but we ARE sure that it makes a little part of us wilt when we see it. We love you ALT.

Christina Hendricks, Elle Fanning, and Alicia Keys at the ’Alexander McQueen: Savage Beauty’ Costume Institute Gala at The Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York on May 2.
Photo: Getty Images/WireImage

Rounding out the sad faces, we have Christina Hendricks in a Carolina Herrera ombrĂ© that appears to be inspired by melting ice cream sandwiches. Elle Fanning does her best space-age French maid (Rosie from the Jetsons, is that you?) in this strange Valentino frock. And Alicia Keys looks a little like a molting alligator in this brown Givenchy couture gown + cropped leather jacket + matchy-poo handbag. Thank you for the memories, and we can’t wait to see what you’ll bring next year! xoxo