Left: Crocs Carlie flat. Right: Melissa purple snakeskin peep toe.
Photo: Courtesy of Crocs/Epaulet
UGH. Crocs. Everything about the perforated, flattened, rubberized horrors made you want to kill them with fire (remember how they even peddled those packets of plastic “flair” that you could customize your shoes with? *barfs violently at the memory*). Regardless of how loudly they were championed by fans who claimed they were “ridic comfortable” or “reasonably priced,” there was just something unmistakably tragic and “sweatpants 365” about shuffling around in gardening clogs of varying upbeat colors. But after months of plummeting stock prices and round after round of fashion blogs and magazines openly mocking the plastic shoes, it seems the company is rallying. Cue to the news that Crocs is going “couture” with “cute” springtime flats. To be all the way real, there’s nothing egregious about these peep-toe skimmers with the contrast insoles and you can argue that they’re OK at $45 a pop, but could you ever really shake the negative brand connotations enough to buy them? And tell anyone who asks what they really are? ESPECIALLY when Melissas are on sale all over interwebz at $50?
+ We can’t bring ourselves to cop Crocs. Can you?