What Would Have Been: Rihanna In ‘The Bodyguard’

Rihanna performing at the 2001 NBA All-Star game halftime show in L.A. on Feb. 20, and ’The Bodyguard’ movie poster.
Photo: Getty Images

OK. We acknowledge the potentially scalding Hot Mess Factor of remaking 1992’s The Bodyguard, but when news circled saying that RiRi might take a stab at Whitney’s leading role, our interests were piqued. Eyebrows up and everything. Especially cause Ms. S&M would look major dipped in leather and tassels and all sort of other hardware and titillating adornments. But since those rumors were smashed to pieces this morning, we took the liberty of scouring the interwebz to pluck all the bits of gear and hard body baubles that we would have loved to see Rihanna in. You know, because Rihanna is our personal plaything to dress up as if she is no more than a paper doll. OH MAN SHE NEEDS TO COME OUT WITH A DOLL. Stat. The kind you can actually play with. Not the weirdly expensive, porcelain-faced, kill-you-in-your-sleep-to-laugh-and-laugh kind. *shudders*

ANYWAY, don’t you think a more form-fitting, black/vinyl version of the Hermes boot-pant hybrid situation would be good for this? Oooooh or even something from The Blonds.

Left: Burberry studded cuff and Zimmermann cage belt. Center: A model on the Hermes A/W 2011 ready-to-wear runway in Paris on March 6. Right: Lanvin necklace and 3.1 Phillip Lim gloves.
Photo: Getty Images