‘Man vs. Wild’ Star Gives Video Game Survival Tips For ‘Mario,’ ‘Half-Life,’ ‘DOOM’

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If you watch a lot of Discovery Channel, you’re probably familiar with the name Bear Grylls. The unassuming Brit stars on “Man vs. Wild,” a show about surviving in nature when you’re, say, trapped on a tundra after an unfortunate base-jump skiing accident. Bear knows how to survive in a variety of these situations, and is more than happy to share his knowledge with the world. Crave Games even has a “Man vs. Wild” game coming out wherein you can attempt to live out Bear’s greatest adventures, without the nasty downsides of having to eat bugs or perform surgery on yourself. You can check out some footage from the game right here.

So Bear knows surviving in nature. But how about surviving in video games? Gamers know how to handle plenty of different situations, from zombie attacks to killer turtles to alien invasions…none of which is covered on “Man vs. Wild.” But surely a man of adventure like Grylls would know how to deal with some of the most basic video game challenges, right? Well, I decided to find out.

The video above covers four well-known video game tropes. Right from the getgo it’s pretty clear that Bear isn’t a gamer, but he did manage to offer some grim advice which may help you out of your next gaming jam.

[Note: You should ignore every piece of advice Bear gives about video games, because it’s all terrible, terrible advice. Listen to Bear if you’re stuck in the woods without food for a week. Listen to GameFAQs if you’re stuck on level 3.]

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