Forget ‘Dodge And Twist': Five Better(-ish) Literature Modernizations

Oh, Hollywood. You don’t really care about us, do you?

After The Hollywood Reporter revealed that there’s a “Sherlock Holmes”-style update of “Oliver Twist” in the works, we’re really starting to reconsider things. It’s bad enough that you won’t produce original ideas, but then you have to go and do something like this. “Oliver Twist” isn’t even the best candidate for this kind of treatment, and this type of logline is one of the easiest to come up with when the original property is available.

If you’re going to make us sit through slightly different spins on the same old story, the least you could do is make it more like these.

Tom Sawyer
“Faking your death isn’t hard. It’s coming back to live that’s the trick.” After years of working undercover on the banks of the Mighty Mississippi, Tom Sawyer is looking for a way back into his normal life. There’s only one problem, his former flame, Becky Thatcher is onto him and will stop at nothing to make sure he stays dead.

Detective Jekyll and Mr. Hyde
A cop is only as good as his partner, but what if your partner is one half of your split personality… the bad half? When the biggest case of Jekyll’s career puts his own family at risk, he must rely on the person he trusts the least, himself.

The Invisible Man
Griffin has a problem. He’s quickly disappearing. Will he be able to hunt down the evil scientist that did it to him before he disappears forever? (Possible hiccup: Invisible action figures are hard to sell.)

The Picture of Dorian Gray
Dorian Gray thought he had it all after he switched out his human form for the image captured in his youthful portrait, but all is not as it seems. Not only is the painting growing older, there’s a sinister figure creeping up behind it.

Codename: Black Beauty
The result of genetic experiments gone awry, a highly intelligent horse has to learn how to navigate a world he doesn’t belong in and solve a mystery that could destroy the farm and every animal he ever loved.