Uwe Boll Slams Michael Bay…And Gus Van Sant(?!?) And Tom Twyker

Poor Uwe Boll. I’ve seen fanboys take a stand against bad directors, but I’ve never seen anybody so reviled that there’s literally hundreds of thousands of people ready to stand up and scream in a clear, loud voice, “For the love of all that is holy, please stop making movies!” Which, of course, is exactly what is happening to Boll, with an online petition practically guaranteed to hit a million signatures before too long.

But why Boll and not others? That’s what Boll himself wants to know, telling MTV News that too many directors get a “free pass.”

Oh boy, here we go again.

“Lets say Tom Tykwer, he did ’Run, Lola Run,’ right? But ’Perfume’ is a piece of sh-t, let’s face it, yeah? So, and um he has a free run after ’Lola’ because people liked the movie. There are a lot of directors like this — they’re getting hype [but] everything [they do] is boring and nobody wants to admit it,” the pugilist provocateur insisted.

“How many good movies did Gus Van Sant do?” he added, continuing his verbal assault on some of film’s best current auteurs. “He did a few good movies but also a few bad movies. But if you have this kind of reputation you get invitations to film festivals or whatever. Micheal Haneke! ’Funny Games’ was a good movie original, but to reshoot that here, was stupid. And everybody thinks the movies are kind of important or something. So, that’s the thing.”

Uwe Boll is like a wounded animal backed into a corner, using his last bit of energy before death to lash out against his attackers. He’s crazy. But while he bears his claws for the likes of Twyker, Haneke, and Van Sant — he saves his true venom for only one man. And that one man is Michael Bay.

“I think he’s really bad. And I think the point is, if you get $250 million for every movie you do, how you gonna make a bad looking movie, with bad sound, bad special effects, whatever?” Boll criticized. “But everything dependent on directing is bad in his movies. And so I think it’s kind of absurd, how some people are getting counted like they are geniuses or whatever. But the reality is that in a lot of these $150 million movies, the real credit deserves to the special effects people. Or the second unit crew.”

One, I don’t think anyone has ever called Michael Bay a genius. Two, Uwe Boll, your honesty is awesome.

So do you think you could make a movie better than Michael Bay with his budgets?

“Absolutely, yeah, that’s the point,” he claimed.

Alright, what do you think? Is there anyway we can get these two to fight? I know Bay is a quad-rillionaire, but I will personally donate $500 to make it happen. Anyone else? Oh, and what do you think about Bay, Boll, Van Sant, Twyker, et all? Sound off below.