Hands up if you’re spending Thursday night drowning in Chinese takeout and watching Netflix ’til your eyes bleed! Yup, the day single people fear most — Valentine’s Day — looms, and soon teddy bears and novelty chocolate boxes will be upon us. But worry not, single readers! When your crippling loneliness starts to set in, just remember that some people have it worse, and in the “Failosophy” video clip below, host Hasan Minhaj shares some of the most cringe-worthy V-Day stories on the Internet. You’ll never feel so relieved to be unloved.
Hasan sorts through trending hashtags like #ValentinesGift, #VDayFail and even simply #love, and proves Twitter users are definitely not shy about their romantic trials. One girl cops to a proposal that involved a insect instead of a ring, another admits “herpez” was all she got from her Valentine, and a third recounts a night where her date confessed to having a degenerative brain condition. “You can tell girls: Yeah, you think you’re fly? A dude with Alzheimer’s still remembers me,” Hasan says, putting his usual positive spin on the situation.
Check out the video below, and tune in to the premiere of “Failosophy” Thursday night at 10:30/9:30c!
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Photo: Brendan Tobin