5 Birthday Gifts For 'The Situation' (That Don't Require A Stripper)

After Sitch rode solo to Pauly's B-Day dinner two weeks ago, we were worried that Mike's special day was going to be one ugly grundle chode of disappointment. Thankfully, that wasn't the case, and even though he went MIA for few hours to wallow in the birthday blues, his "Jersey Shore" roommates delivered when they surprised him with a Wizard of Ass-approved bash.

Still, looking back on everything, we think there are a few gifts that could've made Mike's birthday even better (not that taking home a stripper isn't a cool present and all). Here are some items that might have lit up the aging guido's face.

Indestructible Dumbbells: For a dude that is always working on his fitness, it's important to have the right tools on hand. Sometimes he can't get to the gym (like when the gang's getting wasted at Jenks), so having a set of weights in his bedroom means he can start GTLing before he even brushes his teeth. (That "indestructible" part is just in case Ronnie throws his s*** out onto the patio.)

Bronzer Wipes: The last thing any Shore girl wants is a pale juicehead. Pasty skin is not the business, and these wipes will ensure that if Sitch ever ventures back to Italy (you know, the country without adequate tanning beds), he'll be prepared.

Jumbo Pack of "I Heart Situation" Booty Shorts: We all saw how a little bit of retail therapy helped Mike charm The Bosnian. Perhaps, if he stocked up and gave out personalized Shore Store hot pants to all his DTFs, he would never sleep alone again--assuming he doesn't continue bringing home strippers that are more interested in matching socks.

Body Spray: It seems like every time we catch Situation with some downtime, he douses his privates in a thick cloud of musk. He literally shellacs himself with cologne, so he must run out often. It probably never hurts to have backup.

Personal Blog: Sitch is carrying around a whole lot of secrets, especially about his roommate and alleged hookup partner Snooki. Instead of plotting a master plan on camera that involves the presence of "The Unit," why not let word travel like lightening via the internets?

+ Let us know what you think of our B-Day gift suggestions and share your own in the comments!

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