It’s no secret that the MTV crew is a mouthy bunch. In 2011, we’ve seen (or heard, rather) the most decisive tell-offs — the crudest humor and sentiments that were so absurd or incorrectly strung together we couldn’t forget them if we tried. Check out our picks for Best One-Liners of 2011 here:
Moment: Ming’s “Sex Touch”
Ming was sick of being caught in the middle of Tamara and Jenna’s BFF feud, so she faked an emergency underneath the bleachers after school to get the two to meet face-to-face and hash things out. Unfortunately, Ming wasn’t a natural at feigning urgency, and the “sex touch” was born.
Moment: Sadie’s Birthday Surprise
To celebrate Jenna’s birthday, archenemy Sadie pulled the girl aside at a football game and tore her to shreds, upset by the notion that she had Matty’s attention. No verbal tirade is complete without an iced coffee for the road, and Sadie was sure not to overlook the standard.
Moment: Butt-Head And JWOWW Intersect
Show: “Beavis And Butt-Head”
Beavis and Butt-Head were catching up on the latest from “Jersey Shore” when they noticed JWOWW refer to her future grandchildren as “bitch.” As mocking is the two nitwits’ standard of communication, they deferred to what they knew and elected Jenni the best future grandparent ever.
Moment: Mondo Can’t Keep Up With The Kardashians
Show: “Good Vibes”
Mondo was a little down on his luck after he and his mother, Babs, moved to the West Coast. To make his feelings clear amid the beach bodies and perfect tans of California, he compared his position as the town’s black sheep to that of the Kardashian family’s Khloé.
Moment: Dating Tips From A Personal Trainer
Show: “I Used To Be Fat”
Overweight teen Josh was a little mum when trainer Joey asked him about his dating life. To avoid any confusion on the subject, J educated…other J…about the importance of working the tricep as opposed to the bicep to get girls’ attention.
Moment: Deena, The Linguist
Show: “Jersey Shore”
While Italy’s dating pool left Deena generally cold, she warmed up to a waiter named Ellis, who seemed to fit her perfect “lean cuisine” bill. Ellis had nice teeth, was forthcoming and–you guessed it–spoke very, very well English.
Moment: A Taste Of Her Own Medicine
After surviving umpteen insult-bombs shelled out by Sadie, Jenna finally decided to stand up to her bully, and while she didn’t stoop as low as Ms. Saxton might, J had no qualms about blackmailing the queen bee and leaving her with a tagline with which the cheerleader seemed to be very familiar: “You have to be cruel to be kind!”
Moment: The Smoothest Operator
Show: “Good Vibes”
In a move that would make him the boldest new kid ever, Mondo decided to put his reservations aside on his first day at a new high school and talk to his crush, Jeena. So that things went smoothly, Mondo practiced his opening line as he made his way over to the girl, but by the time he made it to her desk, his quite-tied tongue ultimately led to his undoing, and the possibility that he was a young, gay prostitute.
+ Keep checking back at Remote Control as we roll out more of our Best of 2011 lists!
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