Possible Titles For 'Jersey Shore' Cast Autobiographies

The proud author poses with her newest soon-to-be best seller.

Sure seems like everyone has a tell-all these days ("Soula Coaster," anyone?), but for some reason, most of the "Jersey Shore" cast hasn't jumped on the bandwagon just yet. Perhaps it's because their dirty laundry already gets aired on MTV, but wethinks there's still some great storytelling left to be done in book form. Since we enjoyed thumbing through Snooki's helpful "Confessions of a Guidette" so much, we've come up with some possible autobiography titles for the rest of her roommates.

"Dance Like You're Not Wearing Underwears" by Deena Nicole

While the more popular quote goes something like, "Dance like no one's watching," it's more fitting if her book relates to setting oneself completely free, both metaphorically and literally. (Plus, if you head to the discotheque without underwears, you can probably cut down on laundry time.)

"Doing the Concrete Tango" by Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino

From a purely literal standpoint, the dude threw himself into a concrete wall, but the title really embodies the mental struggle he undergoes from season to season while trying to find the true third person he really is inside.

"I Love You, Just Kidding" by SamRon

There's no way this explosive couple would dare let the other person scribe a memoir alone; they'd absolutely have to write this thing together (if they didn't kill each other first). It would be split into two distinct halves: Sammi would accuse Ron of all of his wrongdoings, and he'd respond the only way he knows how: Deny, deny, deny.

"The Power Of The 21-Hour Nap...And Other Beauty Secrets" by Jenni "JWOWW" Farley

Jenni's book would be more of a helpful guide, chock-full of some of her most-trusted self-pampering techniques, like "How to maintain a golden glow when the only place to tan is miles away," and our personal favorite, "Boost your memory and cognitive skills with a 21-hour snooze."

"Scent Of A Bromance" by Paul "Pauly D" Delvecchio and Vinny Guadagnino

Fist Pump, Push-Up, ChapStick, anyone? The best buds can get into specifics about how they bonded so quickly, plus offer advice on finding a suitable BFF and how to nurture the friendship. Maybe even a sidebar on color-coordinated outfits with your bestie.

+ What do you think of our phony book titles? Can you come up with something more fitting? Sound off in the comments and let us know!

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