Open Rebuttal To A Certain Clothing Retailer Who Dissed Our 'Sitch'

On Tuesday, Abercrombie & Fitch, the clothing company that made oodles of cash selling "Fitchuation" T-shirts to American youth, released a public statement offering "substantial payment" to MTV's "Jersey Shore" cast members, specifically Mike "The Situation," to refrain from wearing their merchandise.

"We are deeply concerned that Mr. Sorrentino's association with our brand could cause significant damage to our image. We understand that the show is for entertainment purposes, but believe this association is contrary to the aspirational nature of our brand, and may be distressing to many of our fans," an A&F spokesperson said in the statement.

It pains us to have elicited concern that our talent's choice of leisurewear would in any way harm A&F fans, but now we have our own concern: If the "Jersey Shore" cast should stop wearing the brand, does that mean those same fans--the ones who love nothing more than to curl up in their A&F sweats every Thursday night to watch their favorite show--should stop wearing it as well? Being pantless might cause them some real distress.

Oh, Abercrombie, what kind of snowball hath y'all set in motion?

We hate to add to the avalanche of publicity that A&F is currently eating up at the expense of our innocent reality TV icons (who declined to comment because they were too busy getting more famous)--mostly because that was the whole point of this shenanigan, wasn't it?--but we're all family here at MTV, and no one messes with our "Situation." There are plenty of neon sweatpants in the sea of franchised fashion, so we encourage him to take the money. And donate it all to Ed Hardy.

Mike, you look better naked anyway.

"The Situation" wears A&F sweats while flirting with Snooki on Episode 2 of "Jersey Shore."