Apologies in advance for the call out, Sam, cuz we actually like ya lots and know you're a good friend to Whitney. But here's the thing: we recently (as in, 15 minutes ago) discovered the extreme awesomeness of Roxy 'Crotch Tat' Olin -- and we just can't possibly imagine why you're not feelin' it, too?!
Sure, you and Roxy have totally different personalities -- you're polite and reserved, she's mad innappropes and a lil' lippy -- but wouldn't it be exciting to have a friend who could stand up to your parents when they expect you go to some Upper East Side fundraiser over a friend's b-day dinner, or simply introduce you to that cute guy at the party who you're WAY too scared to approach?
Roxy's got gusto! Sure, she's bound to embarrass the living hell out of you from time to time, but ya kinda/maybe could stand a little loosening up anyway, no? Plus, Whitney's only been getting closer with her roomie lately, which means you might as well get used to seeing her around. Wouldn't it feel better if three wasn't such a crowd? Just a thought. And not that's it any of our business...