Fox

Listen Up, Idiots: Here Are Emma Roberts' 17 Craziest 'Scream Queens' Quotes

What fresh hell is this, exactly?

Regardless of which "Scream Queens" quotes make you LOL or which make you physically squirm, the way the characters wax insanely quotable poetic throughout every episode is a damn masterpiece. But no other Kappa flies as close to the sun as Chanel Oberlin. Make no mistake: the stuff that comes out of Emma Roberts mouth on this show is insane. Let's take a look back at some of Chanel No. 1's most instantly iconic lines:

  1. "Good morning, sluts."
  2. "Good evening, idiots."
  3. "I’m sorry, did I ask you to pull down my panties and blow a compliment up my butt?"
  4. "Learn to make a pumpkin spice latte, you psychopath."
  5. "Thank you, coffee donkey."
  6. "What was I supposed to do? 'True Tori' was over."
  7. "What fresh hell is this?"
  8. "You get STDs from dirty toilet seats and drinking the water in Mexico..."
  9. "She smells like hot dog water and probably sprained her neck giving blumpkins down at the local bowling alley."
  10. "We're going to play a game called cocaine or dildo."
  11. "This closet is the most precious thing in my life. It’s like a second vagina to me... You have violated my closet vag."
  12. "I once thought about donating them [designer clothes] to charity, but there was something so depressing about a poor person walking around in couture. It's like 'Sorry' but that Lanvin sweater is not appropriate for your job at Roy Rogers, welfare queen."
  13. "I’ll show Rodger and Dodger video proof that their hot new girlfriend regularly rubs it out in her room while watching 'Dora the Explorer.'"
  14. "Now, can we please get back to drinking my pooey hand water?"
  15. "Kaizi is my Asian. He’s not in this class, he’s not even enrolled in this school. I keep him on retainer to come take tests with me."
  16. "No one forced that goat to get as drunk as he did. That's on him."
  17. "Congratulations, stupid hippos."