Whether or not Jon Snow's last occupation really killed him last season on "Game of Thrones," he still might have been better off picking up another, perhaps less knife-wieldy trade, no? Something with a slightly cheerier purpose?
Wedding planning seems as safe a profession as any under normal circumstances, but a wedding in Westeros is practically the most dangerous place to be in the entire Realm.
So when James Franco tried to reimagine the gory HBO drama as a happy sitcom (sans all the slayings and dragons and mutilations), pegging Jon Snow as a party planner for the unholy union of Tyrion Lannister and his full-blooded nephew Joffrey Baratheon of course turned into a full-on disaster. Of course.
In the latest installment of his AOL web series "Making A Scene," Franco came up with "Modern Thrones," a completely NSFW twist on the Red Wedding that's somehow even more deadly than the original.
"I couldn't take any more death and destruction or dragons. I retired from the Night's Watch. I foresook my vows and decided to fulfill my lifelong dream of becoming a wedding planner," Francsnow explained about his career shift. "Imagine how upset I was when I saw them walk in with dragons and swords, the Dothraki ready to fight. There was even a White Walker.
"I just want to marry these two dudes, OK? I don't want anybody's penis to be cut off and eaten on my watch."
Spoiler alert: He did not get his wish.