Plausible Theory Of The Day: Beyonce’s Actually A ‘Dragon Ball Z’ Character


OK, so you know how every day we’re like “Beyoncé is ***flawless” this and “Beyoncé is actually an otherwordly goddess who walks among us YAAAS BEYONCÉ YAAAS YOU LOOK SO GOOD OMG YAAAS” that? Well, we think we might’ve finally figured out what gives the “Partition” singer her superpowers…

Beyoncé is secretly a “Dragon Ball Z” character.

In case you’re not familiar, “Dragon Ball Z” is an anime series about a bunch of ridiculously strong aliens who fight against a bunch of other ridiculously strong (slash evil) aliens.

Each episode…

…contains approximately two pages of dialogue and nine frames of animation. Because an entire episode might revolve around two wounded characters hurling uncomfortably breathy insults at one another, “Dragon Ball Z” ran for over 9,000 episodes — give or take.

I KNOW, RIGHT? Needless to say, I watched every episode. #indoorkiddontcare

Oh, but perhaps most relevant to the discussion is that when the characters power up to fight, they explode in a burst of energy and their hair turns blond because #science.

Now, look at this GIF…

…and look at that photo of Beyoncé wearing Tom Ford’s “Molly” dress while performing on “The Mrs. Carter Show World Tour” in Amsterdam up top, which the living pop legend posted on her Tumblr today.

Does she or does she not look like she’s bursting with enhanced abilities, about to go H.A.M. on some evil dude (who’s name is, like, IDK a reference to the Japanese word for “broccoli”) while “Run The World (MY FIST)” plays in the background? Yes. Yes, she does.


+ Now, watch a bunch of “Dragon Ball Z” YouTube videos set to Beyonce’s “Halo” because relevant, byeeeeeeeeee.

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