You heard the lady.
In the beginning, there were dinosaurs. Then, this meteor was all, "You need to STAHP." Then, like, some other stuff happened, before finally we reach history's crowning moment of glory: On Jan. 29, 2014, Miley Cyrus performed a stripped-down, countrified "MTV Unplugged" performance, and the world may never be the same.
I mean, was this just a teaser of what's to come on the "Bangerz Tour," which kicks off on Feb. 14 in Vancouver? IDK, but, like, probably. Why don'tcha go ahead and enter MTV's Ultimate Fan Experience contest? If you win, you'll score a front-row ticket, the chance to meet Miley, and more. Huh? Huh?! HUH?!
...Anyway, back to Miley's "Unplugged" performance. We were treated to such raw live vocals, the likes of which we haven't heard since Miley's "Backyard Sessions" in 2012. "Wrecking Ball"? All the tears. "Adore You"? Temporarily blinded by the flawlessness. Dolly Parton's "Jolene"? The intensity! #INeverTrustedThatB**chAnyway
As for the instrumentals, the country-western renditions of Bangerz tracks were an AMAZING way for Miley to stay true to her Nashville roots. Speaking of which, "SMS (Bangerz)"? YOU KNOW WE ON THAT ME-OW.
Miley may have radically changed her look and infused more genre-bending elements into her sound, but deep-down? She's still just bein' Miley, even when she's, like, rubbin' up on Madonna and twerking on horses.
Speaking of which, anyone else think that pony looks familiar? Ummm, that's OK! He should! He's been good friends -- neigh, the BEST of friends with Ms. Milez for many years.
Anyway, it was so cute to pick out all of Miley's carefully hidden references to her past -- like this one from "Hannah Montana: The Movie"! Remember the "Hoedown Throwdown"?
Look, she's basically popping it, locking it, and polka-dotting it right before our eyes, just like the old days! Oh, wait. We miiiiiiiight have misheard Miley. Let's listen again.
OOOOOOOOH. Got it. We hear it now. Our mistake. BRB, bowing our heads in shame.
But while we're on the topic of "Hoedown Throwdowns," how cool is it that Miley's totally owning her sexuality onstage and playing with it entirely on her own terms? No wonder she's found a kindred spirit in the Queen of Pop herself.
Just, like, SHUT UP AND TAKE OUR MONEY. We'll buy it. ALL OF IT. I mean, we'd gladly watch Miley dancing with
Molly MDNA any day of the week.
I guess there's nothing else to say except... WE ADORE YOU, MILEY. This very, very, very special episode of "MTV Unplugged" was SO worth the EXCRUCIATING nine-day wait.
No, Miley, thank ewe. With that bit of flawless barnyard comedy, let's all do what we've been waiting to do since Miley's concert ended... WATCH IT ALL OVER AGAIN!!!!
+ Watch Miley Cyrus' "MTV Unplugged" concert special. Hungry for more Miley? DUH. Enter to win the Ultimate Fan Experience, including front-row "Bangerz Tour" tickets, the chance to meet Miley, and more!