It’s Tuesday! Time for another round of “Top 5 Must-Hear Pop Songs of the Week”!
Guess what? We’re on Mars, y’all! That’s right: This week, NASA successfully landed their latest Mars rover, Curiosity, which is now merrily scooting its way across the surface of Mars taking photos of the planet and… uh, I don’t know, putting them on Instagram, I think. To celebrate, here are flaw-free space jams in honor of our little robot friend who’s far, far, far away from home!
1.) Britney Spears, “I’m So Curious”
Any proper Britney Spears devotee knows that our Holy Lady of Frappes had already been exploring extraterrestrial life well over 10 years ago, when she was whipping her hair in a red latex suit and being gifted diamonds by eager astronauts. Still, to honor our robot friend’s smooth landing onto Mars, I’ve selected a song perfect for the occasion: “I’m So Curious”! “I’m so curious/ do you love me,” the pop-princess-turned-Queen of Pop croons on the sugary-sweet “Sometimes” B-side. She wasn’t even 18 years old at the time, yet the Holy Spear-it was already setting her sights on going galactic (and predicting this very space mission, because she is Nostradam-ney.) If only NASA were wise enough to pipe this track into space via Curiosity, any form of intelligent life would come bounding out from behind the rocks they’re hiding and start lip-synching for their alien life. Oh well, maybe next time.
Listen to more Must-Hear Pop Songs after the jump!
2.) Girls Aloud, “Mars Attack”
Free-of-flaw British girl group troupe, Girls Aloud — perhaps more commonly known as the Almighty Aloud — have also found themselves immersed in intergalactic relations. “Mars Attack,” one of the album tracks from their 2003 debut, Sound of the Underground, sees the troupe rock-rocking to the beat on top of a springy, drum-and-bass beat and twangy surf guitar. The result? Essentially one big, swinging ’60s beach party set on Mars, with beautiful robots and 40-story-tall aliens shimmying in space-age bikinis alongside Nadine, Cheryl, Nicola, Kimberley and Sarah.
3.) t.A.T.u, “Cosmos (Outer Space)”
But Girls Aloud isn’t the only girl group that have done their dealings in space. Just a few short years ago, Earth as we knew it was ruled by a stunning Russian teenage duo dressed in schoolgirl outfits and their brooding brand of us-against-the-world dark-pop (or should I say, us-against-the-galaxy.) “Cosmos (Outer Space)” is but one of the many chilly offerings from t.A.T.u’s 2005 sophomore record, Dangerous And Moving. “Our home forever is outer space/ Black stars and endless seas, outer space,” the girls cry out. With its eerie synthesizers and jagged guitars, “Cosmos” makes space exploration seem just about as welcoming as, uh, “Prometheus.”
4.) Starkey featuring Charli XCX, “Lost In Space”
Before my favorite Goth-pop princess was churning out brooding dark-pop masterpieces like “Stay Away” and “You’re The One,” Charli XCX was teaming up with dubstep artist Starkey for a brief gallivant ’round the darkest regions of outer space as a feature on 2011’s “Lost In Space.” After a spacey two minutes of atmospheric, slowly tripping electronic beats and gentle crooning, the LDN-bred chanteuse comes in for a sudden crash landing, delivering a most glorious verse: “I am a satellite/ you got me spinning right ’round/We on a spaceship/ no one else around,” she declares above the breaking dubstep beats. Don’t worry: She comes in peace. But do aliens even like dubstep? Not sure — but I’m pretty sure they’d be a fan of Charli’s massive Spice Girls-approved platform sneakers.
5.) Spice Girls, “Spice Invaders”
Speaking of the Spice Girls, the impeccable pop troupe responsible for Girl Power, Union Jack minis and the greatest cinematic achievement of our time (“Spice World”) have also been to space — well, Spice style. “Spice Invaders,” the bananas o’clock B-side to their 1997 anthem “Spice Up Your Life,” features the fivesome huddled together into a studio babbling about nonsense, harmonizing and yelling at the top of their lungs above a mindless whistling melody. Oh, and if Curiosity doesn’t end up finding much besides some space dust, fear not: The impending Spice Girls reunion during the Olympic Closing Ceremony in London next week is monumental enough that extraterrestrial neighbors from all across the galaxy will be flying in to spice up their lives.
Bradley Stern is a writer from Connecticut. In his spare time, he enjoys organizing his Britney Spears CD collection in reverse chronological order and writing impassioned letters to Congress urging that Madonnalogy be taught in all public schools. But most of all, he spends his time tweeting musing daily about pop music on his blog, MuuMuse.
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