So you're looking to cop Lady Gaga's look from her "Bad Romance" video -- and really, who's not? -- but there's a very good chance you don't have access to stylist Nicola Formichetti or the Haus of Gaga, who created Gaga's looks in the "Bad Romance" video, there's an EXCELLENT chance you shouldn't wear razor blade sunglasses, you maybe can't easily access the 2010 Alexander McQueen Gaga wears in "Bad Romance," and if you have a hairless cat then may God have mercy on your soul.)
Luckily pretty much everyone (save a few New Yorkers in super small apartments) has a bathtub. So get inside of yours to do your creative dress-up thinking. Next, girls, begin by looking no further than your own underwear drawer. Guys, look no further than the nearest girl's underwear drawer! Bras and undies are going to be the key to your look. Think blacks, whites, and red, and then pile on rhinestones and long strands of black beads. (Just don't tell your mom I told you.) Then get crack-a-lackin' on that mascara. The harsher the better.
Okay, next you need white boots. The white boots on the left go up to size 14, so dudes, get on that! But, even better, the white boots on the right have a little Sexy Mrs. Claus cuff -- 'tis almost the season, after all.
Next, an actual attainable-to-real-people product that Gaga wears in "Bad Romance" (one of the few real-people products in "Bad Romance," besides her $99 Heartbeats By Lady Gaga jeweled earbuds) are the white Carrera Champion sunglasses -- you've seen Carreras on Joe Jonas, Kanye West, T.I., and Britney -- Gaga wears toward the end of the video before she blows up the polar bear and the Russian john. And, for serious, Gaga's sunglasses are actually available in stores that real, non-Gaga people shop in. Like Macy's.
Next, nails! Gaga's big into white nails. She's got white nails in her "Bad Romance" video, and she had snow-white nails when she was here at MTV last week. Gwen Stefani's been big into white nails for a minute now and sent her L.A.M.B. models down the runway in Dashing Diva's "Fleet Week" dress white shade. Cop it for eight bucks to cop Gaga's look.
Now there's one final element missing from your "Bad Romance" outfit. And that is...
BAM. You need a semi-flame-retardant and also wearable polar bear. (And in case you were all up in arms about that polar bear going up in Lady Gaga's fearsome flames, OBVIOUSLY that's not a real polar bear. It was part of designer Benjamin Cho's Spring 2004 runway show, and it was a faux-fur polar bear he designed in collaboration with the Humane Society. Anyway, since real people probably don't have access to even faux-fur fake polar bears that look like real polar bears, grab a few friends and see if you can't collectively scrounge up $1099 for this polar bear costume. He looks happier too.