You say you want passion? I think you found it.
Mmm, that's right. Remember what Andy Samberg and Justin Timberlake did for Valentine's and Mother's Day? Remember what The Onion's Smoove B did for journalism? Well young rhymer Jeremih is about to do the same nasty thing, all up in yo birthday plans.
But hold up. Before you let this Chicago-born urban-pop pimp steam up your balloons, it's probably a good idea to get to know him a little bit. It's a responsible choice -- something Jeremih is real familiar with making. See, before he was perving out your special day, Jeremih was racing through high school -- graduating at 16 -- so that he could enroll in engineering school. But, successful as he was, the man had to sing, so he switched over to music business and started making tracks in his free time.
On his debut single, "Birthday Sex" (which makes Day26's "Imma Put It On Her" sound downright vanilla), Jeremih details an unforgettably raunchy present (for a girl with "kisses sweet as Hershey's"), leaving only one question to be answered: "Just tell me how you want your gift, girl." Somewhere, R.Kelly is proud.
+ Watch Jeremih's "Birthday Sex" video right here.