Buzzworthy Battle: David Archuleta's 'Crush' Vs. Paramore's 'Crushcrushcrush'

I know that to hardcore Paramore and Archuleta fans, asking which is more crush-worthy -- David Archuleta's "Crush" or Paramore's "Crushcrushcrush" -- is like asking which is better -- six baby kittens mewing silently because they can't even really mew yet, or a jolly panda nuzzling a little chickadee: both are awe-inspiring, and you JUST CAN'T STOP SINGING BOTH... songs, not the baby kittens and panda/ chick combo.

OR, do we just close our eyes, wish real real hard, and hope that that small intersection of David Archuleta AND Paramore fans forms a super force and creates one mega "Crushcrushcrush... crush" force that simply cannot be effed with?

By the way, here's a handy visual of what that intersection looks like:

Archuleta/ Paramore fans, are you out there? Do you exist? SPEAK!

+ Bonus: Does Lil' Kim and Biggie's demure classic "Crush On You" crush them both?