He's Having a Baby: Clay Aiken Knocks Up His Producer!!!

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(Credit: Will Ragozzino/Getty Images)

File under: HEADLINES WE NEVER THOUGHT WE'D WRITE.

Pete and Ashlee we can handle. But Clay Aiken -- the seemingly asexual American Idol runner-up who covers Madonna in his live shows and about whom articles like this have been written (because you needed a Clay Aiken refresher) -- got this lady pregnant. PREGNANT. Baby on board! That pregnant. And she's 50. And she's pretty much a cougar. Not quite Demi Moore-levels of cougarness, but Clay... dude, um... nice job!

More when we recover. If we recover. And note, David Archuleta, if you're reading this, don't get any ideas! You stay in your room, young man!