Getty Images

I Went To A Dog Fashion Show During New York Fashion Week

This is my story.

In my continuing effort to exclusively cover dog fashion, I was naturally eager to RSVP for a dog fashion show that advertised "canine couture" during this otherwise very human fashion week.

MTV News

I invited a friend/fellow dog enthusiast to Anthony Rubio's show (a self-described "Pet Fashion Couturier"), and after spending 20 minutes trying to figure out where my friend was, we settled in for the show -- which was smart since we would see zero dressed-up dogs for another hour and a half.

I waited impatiently, occasionally letting out a, "where are the DOGS?!" only to be told that there were two other shows happening before them. I begrudgingly accepted my fate.

MTV News

Finally, it was time for the pups, though the opener was an actual beast. As much as I love dogs, I'm not very familiar with breeds, but this one was the size of a Bernese mountain dog but wasn't actually a Bernese mountain dog, if that helps at all. It was also wearing a sequined chevron vest, and I basically passed away right then and there.

MTV News

Most of the dogs were tiny, Chihuahua-types and were held by models as they walked down the runway. While that made it slightly harder to see said canine couture, it was probably for the best since the dogs that did walk were prone to going rogue.

MTV News

Since this was a ~fashion~ show, I'll break down all the dog trends for you. 1) Top hats. 2) See number one.

MTV News

That's right, folks. Spring/Summer 2016 is full of dog top hats, so get on board.

MTV News

Because I'm a dog Stan, I lingered around after the show to see if any of the dogs (read: their owners) would let me take a picture with them.

MTV News

I was turned down two and a half times. TWO AND A HALF! Who do these dogs think they are, Comet from "Full House?" Last time I checked, none of you have been on a celebrated sitcom that's getting a highly anticipated Netflix reboot, so get over yourselves.

MTV News

Finally someone agreed to let me take a picture with their dog (but I couldn't hold it -- hence the "half" in "two and a half"), but it was still great as you can guess from my facial expression (I'm the one in the middle. JK.).

Yes, that dog was also wearing a top hat. The takeaway from this show: your dog is a nobody unless it's wearing a top hat.